On Slow Days, We Just Talk to @Sixers on Twitter

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When there’s nothing going on, we make new mascot jokes. All. Day. Long. Please, can the Phillies do something?

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40 Responses

  1. Ok here’s one….

    If Josh Innes leaves his house in Massurah at 8 am
    And arrives in philly at 9am the next day
    How many Big Macs did he eat on his way to philly?

      1. Being super obese like Josh Innes is a mental disorder. It’s not that he’s lazy or stupid or has bad genes. It’s that the part of his brain that should tell him to stop eating isn’t working. You know that feeling you get the day after you drank a ton of beer and had like 2 cheesesteaks and. Fries… You know how you wake up the next day and say to yourself, holy shit , I can’t keep doing this! His brain doesn’t do that. He can’t stop eating and his brain doesnt tell him to change.

        1. lol, sorry, but the fat jokes don’t ever get old… Although I don’t think Ned Flanders is making a joke, I think he is genuinely concerned

      2. Not to nitpick, but you didn’t take into account the hour difference. He’ll lose an hour traveling east, so it’s only 24 hours.

        24 hours x (2 Big Macs / hour) = 48 Big Macs.

        But those extra 2 were for dessert.

  2. Jim, is your Twitter handle @jimislame because you are lame or is it ironic because you are so cool????

    Why won’t you answer me 🙁 ?!?!?!?!?!?

  3. sorry we lacked in substance today. We’ll try harder to find some material for you tomorrow.

    Awesome updates on your writers own Twitter accounts though!!!

  4. So remember when that guy was threatening mike miss on Twitter… And mike miss got suspended… For like anti gay comments …. Well it turns out that the guy who was harassing mike miss was no other than Josh innes . I heard this from Innes himself. He even called mikes show when he got back from suspension and taunted him. This Innes fatso has got to be fired

  5. Good for Jim.

    Anyways, Josh and I plan in having an hour long handjob session at Cheerleaders this weekend. I’m a little nervous telling Josh he’s gonna have to MAYBE slow down his Big Mac/ Diet Coke intake down by one a day just so I can find his dick come this weekend. Then we can smear Big Mac sauce all over our nips and dong and we can go to town!

    1. It’s comments like these that restore my faith in the philly sports market … Well done.

      And never forget… Philadelphia…. Not only the city where America was born…. Not only the city of brotherly love… Not just the city of rocky …. Or gay Tom hanks with aids … Or where trading places was filmed. ….. But the greatest city in the world , where the true American spirit lives … And commenters like you ring true… This is America… We are free!!!! Fuck the Cowboys!! Fuck the Yankees and mets!!! If it weren’t for Philadelphia you queers wouldn’t even have a city to live!!! So fuck Josh Innes and all hail the crossing broad commentors!!!!

  6. I just had my period. I called Kyle and he rushed over with tampons, but a few rainbow kisses later, the flow was cleaned up.

    Take that Sheena you ugly fat bitch.

  7. Never listened to Innes but man that guy is hated in this town. I thought Sean Brace was the most hated radio personality in this city, not anymore.

  8. Nobody knows who Brace is.

    He does 2 hours in the middle of the afternoon a station barely anybody listens to. Give me a break.

  9. Hey Innes… PYT is selling groupons for a burger a day for a year for only $144…. you might need to buy at least 3 of them to get your fill.

  10. “the 76er’s twitter handle responded to Jim’s tweet?! how can I make this about meeeeee???”

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