Video: Seahawks Fans Getting Their Hearts Ripped out Are Every Philly Sports Fan Ever

My God, this has all the elements:

1) Elation turned to disbelief


Joe Carter.


2) Shock


Ryan Howard, 2010, NLCS.


3) Denial


Poor guy searching for a (meaningful) flag or infraction of some sort. This was me after every big goal scored against the Flyers during the “skate in the crease” era. Between that stupid rule and the phantom traveling call on Allan Ray in the 2005 Sweet 16 against North Carolina, I always just assume an official will be there to nullify what just happened. Hell, the feeling lasted so long after Patrick Kane’s goal that I nearly had to call a doctor.

4) Anger


It’s OK, guy. It’s usually the coach’s fault. Or the puking quarterback.

5) The semi-hot, consoling girlfriend

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You’re so dejected you’re not even gonna be about that action later.


6) The search for meaning


Of what larger plan is this a part? Ronde Barber posed that question to me in January of 2003.


7) The guy who doesn’t know anything about sports


That guy has no clue what just happened. None. YOU JUST LOST THE SUPER BOWL, BRO! Who brought you?! You’re semi-hot girl’s dork brother, aren’t you?


8) There’s always next year

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Actually, never mind. No it wasn’t a great season! You just lost the Super Bowl on the worst play call in the history of sports. WHY ARE YOU SO HAPPY?! You confuse me with your pleasantries. Don’t you have anything to punch? Perhaps a bottle to smash? Ah, whatever. You’re probably over it already since you just discovered football last February.

GO BIRDS! Next year is our year!

H/T to (@Banditmax)


27 Responses

  1. At least they’ve won a Super Bowl unlike christkiller c-o_Cksucker Gay Jeffy and his Gold Standard…..

  2. That Allan Ray phantom walk against UNC in ’05 is still killing me. One of my favorite Nova teams of all time and they got robbed and left the tourney early. Might have been final four team with Curtis Sumpter but then we would have never seen the 4 guard offense.

  3. Early candidate for article of the year! Good Job! Did you fire Jim? He usually writes the afternoon articles.

  4. Poor Seahawks fans. They’ve been fans of that team for three whole years and have only seen one super bowl title. So sad.

    1. How would you like to be living in Cleveland? No titles for any sports team in 50 years.

    2. Oh stop with the “oh the fans only hopped on the bandwagon because the team was good” bullshit. Who gives a fuck? the 08 phils brought alot of bandwagon fans in the area that can’t name one person from the 90’s era phillies.

  5. Blah blah blah…cry me a river…they won a championship last year. Maybe they get a taste of philly here but doesnt even compare to us Eagles fans.

  6. If you have to TELL us you are taking the high road after complaining, then you aren’t taking the high road

    1. Come on dude, this guy got totally screwed. The station wants to put a clown show on in the afternoon shift. They take a loyal employee and treat him like a piece of crap. Do they really think that people want to listen to the Wing Bowl 24/7 because that’s what the station is becoming. You have four people screaming from 6-10 in the morning. You have the carnival barker from 10-1 and now you have Tony coming back paired with a buffoon from 1-6. Houston we have a problem, why did you have to dump it on Philadelphia.

  7. Not a single one of those clowns knows there was a Curt Warner before there was a Kurt Warner. I don’t see any Largent jerseys either. Fans since 2013.

  8. To hear an interesting take on this game, cool sound effects, plus Jose from Norristown saying yo, tune in at 1pm on Wednesday when I’ll be off of phony suspension. Haha get it.

  9. Wait, what’s this? A video breakdown? I’ve been doing this for six seasons now. What’s your next post going to be titled “The world wants to know, are you ready to give it another shot?” Or “Is it racist?” Lay off my shtick Kyle!

    1. Watched your rant about the Pats on your latest show. Bitter? You should be. A bitter pill to swallow for SH fans.

      P.S. I do love your show.

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