We Have to Protect DeMarco Murray's Balls

Photo Credit: Bill Streicher-USA TODAY Sports

Right after Howard Eskin said that OTA Tweets over-exaggerate contact, DeMarco Murray went down hard and took his time getting up. Undoubtedly, many around camp were concerned it was a tear, or a pull, or something else that would keep the Eagles’ feature back sidelined. But according to Murray himself, as reported by Eliot Shorr-Parks, it’s something that probably hurt more:

“I got hit in the balls.”

Be careful out there, guys. We need you. This team is already so goddamn injury-prone, it’s like the island of misfit toys. And speaking as someone who has been hit in the balls so hard before that he actually threw up, you gotta protect those things, DeMarco. That’s a $40 millon sack.*

*American Pharaoh laughs at this testicular valuation.