To celebrate the Buffalo Wild Wings Citrus Bowl, Buffalo Wild Wings partnered with Mountain Dew to create a limited time only sauce – Zesty Citrus. Available in restaurants from December 14, 2015 throughJanuary 2, 2016, the bold citrus flavor of Mountain Dew was infused with lemongrass and spicy red pepper-flakes to create a blast of sweet and spicy that will leave Guests asking for more.
That is fucking disgusting.
Buffalo Wild Wings needs to be removed from the planet. They’re out of control. Mountain Dew? Really? You can’t put Mountain Dew in fake-ass wing paste (it’s not sauce, it’s paste that comes in a plasticular tube). Mountain Dew is not anything. It’s sugar and water. The water cooks off, so you’re left with sugar. ERGO, a better way to list the ingredients would be: SUGAR, artificial citrus flavor, ginger, and salt. But no, BWW is the king of branding and the unwashed gremlins of Middle America will eat this up like it’s going out of style. Ouuuuuuuuuuuuuie! This sauce is the tits! Someone get me dat dang old orrrvertime button and keep ‘erm comin’! I ain’t got health insurance, but I sure as hell got a bothersome ulcer that can only be cured by poppin’ a few of dem Prilosec OTCs! Ouuuuuuuuuuuuuie.
BWW should offer Prilosec as a starter. And then they should punch you in the face for dessert. Because that’s the fate you deserve if you order this food lab hemorrhage.
“The Mountain Dew gives it a thick sweetness like those candied fake fruit slices. They’re just too sweet. There’s a bit of spiciness, but it tastes like it came out of a factory, not an actual pepper,” said one reporter.
No shit! Because dumping soda in anything involved with heat will gum it up with sugar paste, like if you spilled a BIG GULP between your car seats and left the car in the hot sun all day. It’s just gonna dry up and leave everything so sticky that your friends will think you killed Willy Wonka, drove his body out of the great town and tossed it a chocolaty river somewhere. In fact, that might be the best way to describe this wing paste: Willy Wonka’s High Fructose Blood. There’s a branding opportunity.
H/T to countless readers who sent me this