The Phillies are Trying to Lure You to Tonight’s Game with Pokemon

Pokemon Go is all the rage with pretty much everyone right now. The game where you walk around with your head down trying to catch Pokemon is granting bragging rights on text chains for people who do more walking around at work than I do, Justin.

The Phillies are smartly trying to capitalize on the trend tonight (and last night) by telling players they’ll be dropping lures, basically an attraction point for the Pokemon to show up at more frequently, at all Pokestops (places of note) in the stadium all night long. Citizens Bank Park is already built for taking game-long strolls around the concourse, so why not do that and try to catch another goddamn Zubat or Doduo?

It actually works great if you don’t play, too. Find yourself in a long food or beer line? Just loudly state that you just caught a Snorlax near the Harry Kalas statue and voilà, line is gone.

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6 Responses

  1. If you really need a non sports story for some clickbait, heloooooo? White pants too.

  2. “Game-long strolls”

    What is that? Sorry, Jim. When i go to a baseball game I like watching baseball. I’m not some hipster queen like you that goes to be seen and to post a selfie on their Snapchat page. God damnit you suck.

  3. PHUCK THAT NONSENSE…wait until some kid gets killed or a$$jammed by an Uncle Jerry-type because of this fucking ridiculous Pokeman shit. Why the fuck can’t kids just go outside and play ball? Mark my words: something bad will happen and then someone will fucking put an end to it. Besides, if anyone over the age of 11 is playing that fucking game, he likely has a C0-ck in his mouth.

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