This is like bizarro Philly– where our cheap Comcast-backed, overpriced sports haunts are home to literally the media elite. I can’t wrap my head around the fact that a chick from Delco probably threw some electrician apprentice a handy in the exact same spot that Anderson Cooper will host prime time coverage of the nomination for what will likely be our next president. THIS IS OUR TIME TO SHINE… and we presented the nation with Xfinity Live!.

Other scenes from the DNC setup in the spots where you typically tailgate and piss: