You Can Blame the Eagles for Your Terrible Fantasy Team

Photo Credit: Bill Streicher-USA TODAY Sports

I haven’t had an Eagles quarterback or receiver on my fantasy team since the catastrophic year I drafted Kevin Kolb. I don’t go out of my way to avoid them, but they usually get snapped up earlier than they should by the one unabashed fanboy in every league. I also haven’t won my league since 2008, but keeping birds off of my squad this year actually helped in that regard*.

According to Pro Football Focus, the Eagles’ WRs and QB had their worst fantasy season in a decade. So you can totally blame Doug Pederson for your pick of Nelson Agholor and being outscored every week:

Over the last 10 years entering 2016, the Eagles were one of only four teams (along with the Patriots, Saints and Steelers) with at least 200 fantasy points out of the quarterback position every season. Between Donovan McNabb, Michael Vick and the exploits of Chip Kelly, “Eagles quarterback” has been a successful position. So, while Wentz did crack the 200-point threshold in 2016 (he had 214 fantasy points), his performance was 80.6 points worse than the team’s average over that timeframe. Compare that to the Rams, who had the league’s worst quarterback situation in 2016, but with a 10-year average of 183 fantasy points, their 170-point 2016 was only 13 points below the norm.

Only seven teams finished below their 10-year average at the position in 2016, and only the Eagles and Broncos (50.3 points below average) were 50-plus points subpar. Perhaps unsurprisingly, Eagles receivers were also the worst relative to average of any team last year, putting up 234 combined fantasy points, 135.7 points below their 10-year average and almost 70 below the next-worst number in that timeframe.

Wentz started well but faded, and his receivers never made a mark. Jordan Matthews had PFF’s lowest rating for a team’s top receiver – whether you think PFF is respectable or not, that’s bad – and it killed you if you were dumb enough to keep any of those wideouts on your team past week 6.

There’s a lot of talk about the Eagles making a run at Kenny Stills, Alshon Jeffrey, or DeSean Jaccson in the offseason, and those guys would certainly help. But when it comes to your “Ertz So Good” and your “Crusher Doug” rosters, it might be best to skip the guys in midnight green.

*Not having Wentz or Agholor = apparently good. Trading away Drew Brees and going with Eli Manning while all of your skill positions drop like flies from injuries and then somehow ending up with four tight ends and having Anquan Boldin be your top receiver = very, very bad.

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17 Responses

  1. No one gives a f@ck but you. It’s the less athletic version of talking about your golf score.

    1. No, but when I finally do I’m going to beat the hair dye, out your old decrepit ass for getting pills on credit then skipping town.

  2. Anybody getting fucked up at the draft ???

  3. I only wrote Mikey a couple scripts for pills! I had no idea he’d get addicted and end up in rehab!

    1. You also might wanna check if any of your prescription pads are missing there skip….

    2. If theses Mike Missanelli prescription pain abuse rumors are true then he should be considered a weak man. I had surgery to repair a torn labrum and denied all pain medication. I did it the old fashioned way, no medication whatsoever sucked it up just out with the pain like a real man and 10 months later I was pitching again.

  4. Probably because Wentz sucks but gets every excuse in the book. Sorry Cuz, you were wrong as usual. He was beyond a reach last year because Jeffy needed to mirror every aspect of the Reid era

  5. Don’t cut Rob off on his way to picking up his kids from soccer practice. Dude is one tough cookie.

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