That’s the first word that comes to my mind when I think about the game against the Bucs yesterday.


The Eagles, in their own right, almost snatched a turd of a win from the jaws of Fitzmagic, but it wasn’t to be. More compelling, however, is that we’ll collectively revel in the shit from a disappointing and unexpected loss to the surging(?) Tampa Bay Bucs, who now own wins over two of the presumed top teams in the NFC.

But I’m going to start this paragraph with a conjunction, because the first four started with the letter T. The Eagles were playing without, arguably, three of their best offensive players yesterday– Carson Wentz, Alshon Jeffery, Darren Sproles, and then add in large chunks of Jason Peters, Mike Wallace and Jay Ajayi. It’s a borderline miracle they were in contention to pull that one out considering what they were working with offensively.

Sure, you might say that they won the Super Bowl last year without some of those guys, but that doesn’t absolve their absence of meaning. One of Wentz, Sproles, or Jeffery would have been good for an extra touchdown yesterday, which – math – would have led to a tie if you remove ALL CONTEXT and write only in theoreticals. That’s not how things work, and you play the hand you’re dealt, but I find it totally meaningless to overreact about the offense seeing as though it is nothing like it will be in a week or two, personnel-wise, once the gang gets back together and then Howie Roseman gets Josh Gordon. What?

Anyway, the defense was more of the issue yesterday, particularly Jalen Mills. Who…  um… didn’t live up to his pre-game hype:

Kill that shit today.

Yes, kill it.

I’m not a Mills hater by any stretch, but he did not have a good day. His biggest offense, in my opinion, was his coverage (term used loosely, and in air quotes, with a big fucking sad face next to it) of DeSean Jaccson on 2nd and 13 when the Eagles needed to, well, not do this:

That soft of a cushion is bad for your back. What did Mills think ya boi was going to do here– torch him for another 75 yards with a deep-in-their-own-territory bomb for the jugular? No way. This play was all about the first down. It would’ve been made even worse had DeSean turned around and not run out of bounds for reasons that are completely unknown, but whatever, you do you, D-Jac, you earned it.

We can fault Darby for the missed tackle. We can fault Jenkins for not giving help on the first play. But Mills was the worst yesterday, and this play isn’t getting enough attention. That throw effectively won the game.


Josh Gordon

Kevin made his case against this, but let me just say that I am firmly in the PRO Gordon camp. Vegas… not so much for the Birds:


There’s a reason why the Patriots are number one here– great teams find value and exploit it. There’s little risk to bringing a player like Gordon into a winning culture. And seeing as though the Eagles are the reigning Super Bowl champs and there’s not an undercurrent of mutiny the way there is in New England – who by the way got pounded yesterday – I see not a better place.

The Browns have enough to worry about that Gordon was no longer worth their time or patience. Teams don’t crawl out of the gutter on the back of a troubled wide receiver. But teams can go from good to great with one.

To be clear, I don’t think Gordon is necessary or will even happen. The Browns will try to trade him before 4 p.m. today and they’re undoubtedly trying to create the market. My guess is it doesn’t take much to land him. Therefore, his services would be low-to-medium risk with a potentially high reward. Let’s take a puff of that shit.


Two good takes

Zach Berman:

You might think otherwise about the defense after those two big plays, but look what the Eagles did a week and a half earlier against Atlanta. Their home/road splits were noticeable a year ago (they allowed nearly 13 more points more on the road than at home). They need to get to the quarterback more than they did Sunday. Of course, that often comes when playing with a lead, which the Eagles didn’t do against the Buccaneers. But it’s not as if the Eagles are going to give up 75-yard touchdowns every week.

Even more: They’ve faced two of the top wide receivers in the league, and maybe the two best receiving units in the NFC, so things will skew back in their favor against the Cololots and the Titans.

Jimmy Kempski:

At the end of the season last year, we determined that the Eagles scored 71 more points by going for it on fourth down than if they had punted (or attempted a field goal).

All season long, Pederson gambled and mostly won. We noted that it was highly unlikely that every Eagles season would have the same level of success on fourth down that they enjoyed in 2017, but that more often than not, going for it is absolutely the right call.

It was the right call on Sunday, too. The Eagles were down 13, they had a manageable distance to go to pick up a first down, and the benefit of scoring a touchdown on that drive outweighed the downside of giving up 35 or so yards of field position to a big-play offense that had already proven it could score from anywhere on the field.

So I’ll just say this. Before you really want to kill that decision, remember how much fun you had at the Eagles’ Super Bowl parade because Doug Pederson has some balls.

Forget about the size of Doug Pederson’s balls for now… as hard as that may be to do… the Philly media usually isn’t smart enough to understand this sort of thinking, but Kempski is. And perhaps the rest of the media is today, too, in the face of how it worked out WELL last year. No issue with any of the fourth down decisions yesterday.


He sucks

Not sure what was eating Reuben Frank yesterday, but his subtle crusade against Nick Foles was ridiculous. Chew on these tastykakes, er, takes:

WTF? You mean the one on fourth and long with the game on the line when he scrambled around, evaded a sack, bought time, and almost completed a miraculous pass to Corey Clement which would’ve put the Eagles in a position to win the game, that throw? That’s the one he can’t make? OK there, chief, I’ll be sure to note that on his report card and dock him points for “trying to win the game.”

More from Roooooooooooooob:

I’ll never understand Nick Foles. Ever. He can shred Bill Belichick’s defense with 100 million people watching on the greatest stage in sports or he can look like he’s never played the game before. And then he can have games like Sunday where he’s both those guys. I can’t figure him out and I never will. His final numbers look good (35 for 48, 334 yards, 1 TD, 0 INT, 99.5 passer rating), but honestly, he never gave the team a chance to win. Carson needs to get back soon.

Hot take here that he’ll never understand why the backup quarterback is sometimes good and sometimes bad.

Literally the line before this he wrote how you can’t give FITZPATRICK time:

Other than an early Fletcher Cox sack, the Eagles got very little pressure, and when you give Fitzpatrick time, he’s really good. The D-line is the heart of this team, and they have to be better.

While I agree with his assessment of the Eagles’ D-line yesterday (yuckstains), he just described what makes a quarterback a backup. The fact that Foles has band-aided the Eagles to six meaningful wins, including a Super Bowl MVP, is all the more reason we should just slide off his massive dick and thank him for the job he’s done.

Carson now. Frank Reich next week.