This Weekend, We Are All Chiefs Fans

Photo Credit: Denny Medley-USA TODAY Sports

Don’t be that guy.

Don’t that person cheering for Andy Reid to lose. Don’t you dare.

Yes, it’s true that Andy could never win the big one during his time with the Eagles. He blew timeouts, couldn’t manage the clock, and his teams came up short on the NFL’s biggest stages, time and time again.

Therefore.. what? We root against him? Cheer for him to lose? That’s dumb.

Here are four Captain Obvious reasons to pull for Andy tomorrow:

1) He gave us a decade of success

Andy suffered just three losing seasons during his 14 years in town.

The Eagles won 130 games in that time frame to go along with 10 postseason victories, four conference championship game appearances, and a trip to the Super Bowl. His teams were good, the Birds were relevant, and outside of some random clunker seasons, they were always competitive.

I think sometimes people forget how bad the team was when Andy took over. It was dreck during the tail-end of Ray Rhodes’ tenure, when they finished with nine wins and 22 losses in the combined 1997 and 1998 seasons. Bobby Hoying and Rodney Peete weren’t exactly getting the job done. Reid came in, drafted Donovan McNabb, and came up four points short of a Super Bowl ring.

2) He’s playing the Patriots

Surely you don’t want to see Bill Belichick and Tom Brady win another Super Bowl?

You should automatically be pulling for New England to lose, which means you’re pulling for the Chiefs to win. There’s no justifiable reason for any Eagles fan to cheer for the Patriots over the Chiefs.

If you’re telling me that one of Reid, Belichick, Sean Payton, or Sean McVay is going to win a ring next month, you HAVE to prefer Big Red winning it all. There’s no other option. I guess McVay would be my #2 and if the Patriots end up playing the Saints I’m gonna puke. I’m gonna ralph everywhere.

3) He gave us Doug Pederson

Andy came from the Mike Holmgren coaching tree, then produced Doug Pederson from one of his own branches.

Doug won the Eagles’ franchise its first Super Bowl.


Andy’s fingerprints appear on the Lombardi Trophy. They’re pretty faint, but if you do enough forensic digging you can find them on there. That’s the transitive theory.

4) He’s still wearing shorts in January

Chiefs by 50.

Seriously. I better not catch anybody on here rooting against Andy Reid. Y’all are lame.

Time’s yours.

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12 Responses

  1. I just put a nice wager on the pats at parx . Even though Mahomes might be Andy proof I Can’t see that fat fuck winning

  2. Although I’m firmly in the pro-Andy camp and will be rooting for him Sunday, we have a 20 year history of knowing this is juuussst abut where he shits the bed.

  3. *Five Conference Championship game appearances

    Big Charlie’s Saloon is gonna be packed on Sunday

  4. He’ll find a way to blow the game in the fourth like he always does. Your monday morning headline will read “Andy Reid loses game in most Andy Reid-way possible.” Book it.

  5. ran him out of town. OH BS! I got tired of the national media telling us how Philly didn’t appreciate that genius Andy. And how we were wrong for being impatient after 14 years. Andy helped make me the miserable wretch I am. So I’m rooting for him to be out-coached for the (every) consecutive time against good coaches.

  6. When did it become cool for white, non-southern people to start using the word y’all? Every time I read it I get the douche chills.

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