Dallas Cowboys Announce that Earl Thomas Will Not be a Cowboy

When you run a team Twitter account, it might not be a great idea to report that a highly sought-after free agent, who was extensively linked to your franchise, is going to another franchise instead

But that’s what the fine folks running the Cowboys Twitter account went and did, y’all. They decided to tell their fans that Earl Thomas is headed to Baltimore via their “free agency tracker,” seen right here:


The responses from jilted p̶o̶s̶e̶r̶s̶ fans are very good, after the jump:

Sorry, Scooter Magruder.

And here’s one from “Nappy Head Ass” –

Are the Cowboys just trolling their fans?

Seems that way:

This guy brings up the Yankees, since most Cowboy fans are also frontrunner Yankee fans:

Here’s Wayne Dupree from the Wayne Dupree Show, whatever the hell that is:

I also love this graphic, I might have to use it in the future:

Anyway, time’s yours!

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9 Responses

  1. Someone should tell Jacob the Yankees totally had the resources to sign Harper and Machado and they didn’t because they’re being cheap

  2. We’ve seen Kyle’s sports betting videos.

    No one actually believes that’s taking up that much time.

  3. Great content Kinker … how about a post on how the remaining RB free agents would fit in with the Eagles?

    1. That would require in depth analysis and sustained effort.
      Not going to happen when you can get revenue from hawking sports betting and fake shirts and copying and pasting contents
      from other places.

  4. Anything on potential Eagles draft choices?

    Nm, anything new on Kendall Jenner? Did any Eagles post anything on Twitter so you can share?

    Anything on if $BA will initiate buybacks in wake of the grounding of 737 Max planes? A lot of airlines will be looking for reimbursement for lost revenue from cancellations. What are your thoughts Kev?

    1. My mind is bolanky.
      My mind is blank every day i sit down in my onsey and type of this quality stuff day after fn day.
      My cut and paste buttons are broken and i’m tired of having to buy new ones out of my own pocket.
      I never should have left my job at CBS.
      I have to help kyle S pay off those 2 houzes he ‘owns’.
      That’s the only reason i’m here at this cash cow.

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