The U.S. Women Just Scored 13 Goals in a World Cup Game

USA 13-0 Thailand
Photo Credit: Michael Chow-USA TODAY Sports

Thailand was not a World Cup 2019 favorite, but holy smokes did they get steamrolled this afternoon by the United States.

Our ladies set a tournament record by scoring 13 goals in their opener, a game that was pretty much over after five minutes of play.

Here’s the list of goal scorers:

  • Alex Morgan (12′, 53′, 74′, 81′, 87′)
  • Rose Lavelle (20′, 56′)
  • Lindsey Horan (32′)
  • Sam Mewis (50′, 54′)
  • Megan Rapinoe (79′)
  • Mallory Pugh (84′)
  • Delran, New Jersey’s Carli Lloyd (90+2′)

Team USA took 39 shots and put 20 on goal while Thailand mustered two. Ten of the U.S. goals came in the 2nd half alone.

It appears as though the U.S. women are not messing around. They are looking to become world champions…

….world fucking champions.




17 Responses

  1. This was the most amazing awesome incredible unbelievable thing I have ever ever seen

    I am looking forward to the story tomorrow in the Philadelphia Inquirer by Jon Tannenwald
    I sure hope it is another one of his endless rambling pieces. That is how he rolls
    I just finished the Carly Lloyd piece last night. I read it for the last 2 1/2 years.

  2. More like Thigh-land, am I right? But in all seriousness, these fine womyn appear to be relatively well-fed and privileged. So, are you sure this is soccer?

  3. So what, bunch of ugly US dykes beat pretty Thai girls.

    Big tits, little feet, that’s a hit in any man’s league!

  4. Not a real sport….for women or men. Theres your equality….you’re welcome ladies.

  5. Can’t wait to meet Sean Cottrell or Jim McCormack or the other “s—t ton of writers” at the next Meet & Greet!!

  6. Soccer posts are killing this site, womens soccer posts will have it flatline.

    1. not if their uncovered pictures of Hope Solo’s meat curtains

  7. So a bunch of American pitbulls took down these lithe Thai foxes. Is anyone really surprised?

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