New Jersey Asks Park Visitors to Stop Peeing and Pooping in Water Bottles

New Jersey parks reopened a little less than two weeks ago.

That’s the good news.

The bad news is that public restrooms on location remain closed. As such, visitors have been left to their own devices, and they’re exhibiting extremely uncouth behavior when it comes to defecation and urination.

This resulted in a warning from the powers that be, via CBS New York:

State Police Superintendent Pat Callahan dropped the surprise news at Monday’s daily press briefing, revealing state police found discarded human waste left behind by park goers.

“The state park police reported an inordinate amount of urine and feces being left behind in the parks in water bottles,” Callahan said.

And Philly Voice:

“There is a zero tolerance policy for that,” (Callahan) said. “The whole idea behind the parks is to give our citizens the ability to go out there and enjoy fresh air and have time outside. That report from the park police was certainly disheartening to say the least.

“Our park police, our counties, our state police will be on watch for that. We understand that the restrooms are closed, but people should plan accordingly and should not be urinating in bottles and leaving them behind because that could lead to us taking another approach going forward.”

Wow, what a turn of events. Imagine taking your dog down to Timber Creek for a Sunday outing and someone has the audacity to leave a pee or poop bottle behind. That is totally barbaric behavior. We’re talking Cro-Magnon levels of coarseness here.

Imagine if the parks have to be shut down again because of this savagery. That would be another one of those situations where you don’t know whether to laugh or cry.


11 Responses

  1. i know they give emmy’s for fetching coffee at K y W -TV

    anything new on the Union we might want to know about?

  2. Step into the light!!! All are welcome. Aaaaalllllll are welllcome!!!

  3. how do you defecate into a water bottle? I mean, that’s talent

    seriously though, if you are opening a public park, then open the damn restrooms

  4. Homeless people love peeing in water bottles

  5. Trump is planning on sending drug offenders to rehab facilities. This will take care of the homeless problem and prison reform. Trump has been awesome. Meanwhile Biden takes money from private prisons.

  6. Once took a piss in an empty Natty Bo pounder while driving down Coastal Highway in OC, MD. My piss would’ve probably tasted better than the Natty Bo.

  7. Unbelievable how well Trump and the Republicans are doing with this crisis. Numbers don’t lie. Trumps approval rating is sky high. Biden is getting investigated. Trump 2020!

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