West Virginia’s Governor Wants You to “F****** Follow the Guidelines”

West, by God, Virginia.

Governor Jim Justice isn’t messing around. He wants residents down there to follow the COVID-19 guidelines, and only then will they return to whitewater rafting, hiking, hunting, and eating pepperoni rolls:

Unfortunately, Justice declared that this was an audio glitch, and says he would never use the F word:

“Today at our news briefing there was an audio glitch,” Justice said. “And it sounded like that I had said a bad word. A word that I would never say nor have I ever said. No possibility in any way, shape, form or fashion.”

According to a statement released by Justice’s office, the governor’s actual quote was that he encouraged all businesses to reopen only “if they can follow” the guidelines.

Hmmm… do you believe him? Not sure I do, but either way, thank you governor for a good laugh.


6 Responses

  1. Why hasn’t the media spoke about all the great things trump is doing to stop the pandemic?


  2. anything from the Maestro on his shrewd and well-timed acquisition of a NY Sports blog just before there is no sports and no gambling? bwahahahaha

    better call channel 3 and beg for your old job back, Kinksley

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