The Philadelphia Stars fell to the New Orleans Breakers 23-17 in their first game of the USFL season. The Breakers were at the Stars’ 42 yard line, up six on 3rd and 2, with 1:49 left on the clock. The Stars needed one stop before QB Bryan Scott could lead them on a game-winning drive that people would be talking about for hours. Then #94 Michael Barnett jumped offside and the game was over:


A defensive lineman named Barnett committing a penalty at a major part in the game? Shocking.

“It’s always him.” – head coach Bart Andrus

I needed to find this clip so I could feel something about the Eagles I haven’t felt since January 16th. Without it I would’ve been too wound up going into the draft. This took the edge off. Watching a Barnett jump offside transported me back to Monday Night Football against the Cowboys. I forgot what it felt like to live and die with every snap on a Sunday afternoon. Now I’m ready for Howie Roseman to draft a Day 3 LB who can’t get on the field in the first round.

Also, we have to talk about Bad Hair Bryan Scott. Can’t have my QB out there looking like the Flock of Seagulls flight attendant from The Wedding Singer:

I don’t even understand the physics of that cut. He looks like he was sent from Hell to bring his brothers back and save his father:

And what is with the Canadian landing strip-to-beard combo? Doesn’t really scream franchise QB either. Is it time to let Case Cookus cook?

P.S. The USFL is running a Hard Knocks style show this season. In the first episode, a Pittsburgh Maulers RB gets cut because he didn’t eat chicken salad and instead wanted pizza at the team hotel. That’s how you set the tone for the season: