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Dan Baker is throwing out the first pitch Friday to celebrate 50 years as the Phillies’ PA announcer. We had to get the spirits up since it’s a rainy Thursday and now Mickey Moniak is sidelined for 4-6 weeks. Lets take a look:

Strong right out of the gate! For a second I thought this guy was just an asshole and sent in Dan Baker introducing Bryce Harper. I had to watch this one like three times before I realized it was actually him. The way he held the ‘-ies’ in Phillies and the ‘prrrrr’ on Harper. This might be a distant Dan Baker relative.

Here’s James, who may or may not be an NCAA Champion according to his polo, so respect greatness when it deserves to be respected:

This is what we call the old college try. No one talking on the phone with James is going to confuse him with Dan Baker. But he tried and we award bonus points here at CB. Plus pulling Wes Helms out of your ass when you have 100 seasons of Phillies rosters to choose from is what I like to call going the extra mile.


Our only verified submission on the day:

WOW. We’re going to have to go to the judges on this one, Billy Bob:

I wanted to originally take points off for Dan not being on screen and the fact it was recorded three years ago. But if I’m not taking any off for the first one it wouldn’t be fair here. Dan talked a little bit of shit coming into it to. I like a little fire in the belly of a competitor:

Once Dan Baker hangs it up in 30 years I think the Phils have to slide this guy in. No one would be able to tell the difference:

I’ll keep updating this blog if people keep submitting their impressions.

Had a couple of submissions lets break ’em down:

Thanks to Jason sending in his buddy. Didn’t love how it started, but I love how it finished. Gonna have to dock points for no place in the lineup or number. Treat me like I’m blind and you are painting the picture of a game. “Centerfielder Shane Victorino”. Good, great, grand. Where are we at in the lineup? Is he batting or did he catch a flyball? I have questions. I’m blind remember? Dan Baker gives me the answers.

Tom from out of nowhere! I DID NOT see a Soprano coming from the Vanilla Fro! When he hit the “Phillies” I thought I was transported back to CBP. Jesus dude. Show off much?

 

Solid all around. That was good and this guy was leaning back. Would love to see what he could do if he stood up expanded the diaphragm a little and really let it fly.

Idk if it’s me, but this guy doesn’t sound like baseball. What I do know is TODAY this guy could be the best ringmaster in the circus game. “Phillies Fans!” “Welcome to Citizens Bank Park!” I was waiting for a tiger to jump through a ring of fire. The music was a great touch. Also, I love that kitchen. Felt cozy.

I’m pretty sure that’s Pat Burrell’s walk up song. Any tribute to Pat the Bat is going to get you extra bonus points from the committee.

This guy is great. He’s also a Voice Over artist so we have to judge on a curve. This is like putting 2002 Barry Bonds in a Little League Home Run Derby. But if you need to get up for the Phils today John is giving you a little taste of what the lineup will sound like.

Thanks to all the submissions!