NBA player Cam Payne was in Stone Harbor over the weekend and went to one of the greatest institutions down the shore, Uncle Bill’s Pancake House. Only problem is that it appears as though he hated it:
Cam Payne just put uncle bill’s out of business pic.twitter.com/KBYXgdmBH5
— g (@gracephully) July 6, 2022
These two Instagram stories were six hours apart. We have to assume it’s because he was Mad Dogging* that whole time:
Cam Payne was probably in New Jersey with Mikal Bridges. I had a buddy who saw Bridges at The Whitebrier and if that’s not enough proof, here’s his IG story from this weekend:
Phoenix have just signed two wings in the last couple of hours.
Also, Instagram Mikal Bridges is in New Jersey.
Take what you want from this pic.twitter.com/bJ1LXJGT9Z
— Thunder Moneyball (@geola388) July 3, 2022
Listen I’m not going to fault Cam Payne for his Uncle Bill’s take, assuming that’s what this is. I probably haven’t eaten at one in 10+ years. Not because they’re bad, but because its always a 90-minute wait. I’ll just get a donut and coffee from Duck Donuts and call it a day. And I’m not faulting a spot for being in high demand, but maybe they’re too big now. They’re the Pat’s and Geno’s of shore breakfast spots. Maybe they’ve sacrificed the food quality for profits. Maybe the waitstaff, typically made up of college and high school kids, were all hungover celebrating America’s Independence. There are a number of factors that could go into Cam Payne’s purported experience. The great thing about the shore is there are a million breakfast places if one is busy. I’m a Dock Mike’s guy in Sea Isle. They’ve never let me down and they turn tables over like Diplo on Molly. Avalon Coffee and Isabel’s have some of the best sandwiches this side of the Atlantic. Sunset Pier in the Inlet has the views. Even Wawa works for a Sizzli. Cam Payne will be just fine. Uncle Bill’s will be just fine.
*Mad Dogging (v) a term for puking and shitting at the exact same time usually while on the toilet. A subject who is Mad Dogging pukes through the gap between their legs because they are unable to leave their post in fear of excrement secreting from their ass do to the forceful nature of vomiting. Named after one of my basketball teammates in college who got hammered off of some MadDog 20/20.
“Where’s Chris? We had plans for breakfast.”
“You didn’t hear? He was Mad Dogging the whole night.”