The Big Story on Action News: Weatherman Discovers Caffeine

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6ABC’s Adam Joseph has discovered what you already knew. Caffeine can be a real bitch:

First things first, this is a wild move to be a tea guy most of your life, and then one day spring for two large coffees after 12 p.m. That’s like using the front right burner on the stove to cook all your life, then one day waking up and becoming a front left burner guy. Then when your food catches fire because you’re not used to the power of the left burner, you try to put it out with gasoline. What the hell was going on with the weather that day? If I’m not mistaken, the last two months of weather reports have been “hot” and “very hot”.

Another thing  –

I don’t know if I trust my local weatherman being a tea guy.* America wasn’t invented on the backs of a bunch of tea drinkers. You think Cecily Tynan is going to dedicate her illustrious career to Lipton when all is said and done? Absolutely not. 

I would’ve written that I’ll never trust an Adam Joseph weather report ever again, but I found this video of him taking out a kid on a BMX bike and now I’m back in. This is the kind of killer instinct that keeps 6ABC on top:

*Kinkead: tea is underrated, it’s not just for the Brits

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