The Seahawks video editor showing up to work thinking he’s going to clip some DK Metcalf highlights:

He probably tried to pull a carpal tunnel flare up to get out of it, but his boss wasn’t having it. Oh your fingers hurt? Now your back is going to hurt because you just pulled JJAW duty. I counted seven catches in this highlight reel which would account for 44% of his career total:

Let’s break them down because I’m almost positive one of them was a pre-season game:

Catch #1 – Steelers, 10/11/2020:

The season from hell. This one was hauled in for 37 yards from Carson Wentz. You definitely remember this game more for Chase Claypool burning Nate Gerry on the game winning touchdown than JJAW’s catch:


Catch #2 – Seahawks 11/24/19:

JJAW had five targets this game. FIVE. That’s five too many. This one was a 30 yarder from Wentz that led to a Zach Ertz touchdown which brought the score to 17-9 Seahawks. Wentz had 45 attempts for 256 yards, 1 TD, and 1 INT. Woof. I remember this game. It was brutal.


Catch #3 – Dallas 12/22/19:

Another 17-9 game. The Eagles had three in 2019. This one they won and spoiled Dallas’s division title repeat. The Birds took care of business the next week and beat the Giants. JJAW had two catches. This one was a 27 yard pitch and catch from Wentz on the first play of the game! He followed it up with a catch for 12 yards on the same drive! Was this a breakout game for JJAW? Nope. He didn’t see a ball for the rest of the game.

Eagles fans celebrated the only way they knew how. Black out and sneak into the press conference to ask Doug Pederson how was he going to stop Eli Manning next week:


Catch #4 – Washington 01/03/2020

The night Doug Pederson fucked over the Giants. It had to be if JJAW played 40% of snaps. He had two catches. One from Jalen Hurts and one from Nate Sudfeld, who I might add threw the best deep ball on the team according to Jeffrey Lurie. I’ll never not laugh watching the Giants players realize that Doug was giving them the middle finger in real time:


Catch #5 – New Orleans 11/21/2021

The Eagles ran the ball down the Saints throats to the tune of 242 yards this game. It was a 24:50 pass to run split. Somehow JJAW got in on one reception for 23 yards. This is the game the Eagles found out their identity. This dude’s ankle still hasn’t recovered:

Catch #6 – NYJ 8/27/2021

I was right! This was a preseason game. The Seahawks actually clipped a highlight from a fucking preseason game. Brutal. JJAW played the Jets twice in the regular season during his career and played a total of 16 snaps. In this game he led the team with 57 yards. Who could forget this all timer? Truly one of the greatest preseason endings:


Catch #7 –  Miami 12/1/2019

JJAW’s only touchdown as a Philadelphia Eagle. It came in one of the worst losses of the 2019 season so zero people remember it. The 2-8 Dolphins vs. the 5-6 Eagles coming off two straight losses to the Patriots and Seahawks. The Dolphins were one of the worst assembled teams of all time. They started out 0-7. I’m pretty sure the Dolphins owner wanted to pay Brian Flores $100k for every game he lost that season. I remember videos of Eagles fans everywhere at Hard Rock before the game. It was going to be domination. Then the Dolphins started running fugazi plays like these:

The Birds then went up two scores in the third quarter only for DeVante Parker to go nuts and break our hearts. I thought the season was over at this point. If it wasn’t for the NFC East being one of the worst divisions of all time we never see the playoffs.

Stay dry out there JJ: