Thursday night, the Mayor of Upper Darby, Barbarann Keffer, was arrested on suspicion of DUI:

Here’s the thing though –

I’d be more shocked if my Delco mayor didn’t have a drinking problem. Just like I want my lawyer to be from the Main Line and my meat guy to be from South Philly. I want my Upper Darby mayor drinking Twea Lights and smoking Marlboro Reds with her constituents. Her name is Barbarann, for God’s sake. It’s two names combined into one. It’s like the nurse forgot to tap the space bar when typing it out on the birth certificate and her parents just went with it because the Birds game was on in an hour and they still had to be discharged. I mean was there even an election? You throw a woman named Barbarann on the ballot in Delco and she’s almost guaranteed to win.

I want to believe the mayor of Upper Darby is chosen the same way the Chinese dynasties were back in the day, except it’s just a bunch of Irish-Catholic women with alleged drinking problems. Upper Darby in the 80s was ruled by the Mary Pat Dynasty until the Mary Catherine Dynasty took over in the 90s in the Battle of Drexel Hill. The Sue Dynasty had a 20 year reign until the Barbarann’s unseated them in a case race at Barnaby’s one night.

If I know Barbarann from Delco like I think I do she’ll dust herself off and be in Jetro for the game Sunday with a lager in one hand and a menthol in another.

Kinkead: gotta throw this in at the bottom –