We don’t kink shame here at Crossing Broad we just report the facts and the facts are Micah Parsons has never said no to a game of This Little Piggy:

Jesus I feel like foot fetish is the last thing I’d reveal to people. Something weird? I wear my socks to bed or I have to have the TV volume on an even number. We went 0-60 real quick. Again not kink shaming here, but this is a children’s show. Millions of young Cowboys fans are finding out today what the most popular sexual fetish in the world is. Micah is building an army of Texas foot freaks (not a kink shame) who are going to grow up and want to soak their significant other’s feet in the closest thing they can get to a Super Bowl.*

Imagine if Dan Quinn gets poached and Mike McCarthy hires Rex Ryan. Could you imagine that linebackers room? Just swapping old war stories over the best dogs each other has seen over the years. Rex would get that tattoo of his wife in a Mark Sanchez jersey corrected to Micah’s real quick.

James Harden’s feet probably keeps him up at night:


*That joke sucked but we’re legally required to make a Super Bowl joke in every Cowboys blog we write.