Put the flags at half mast. Get the kids out of school. Tom Brady has retired.



I love when sports analysts do this shit. There is nothing that gets my dick harder than listening to a guy compare a quarterback’s retirement to national tragedies. You know where I was when I saw Tom Brady retired? Couldn’t fucking tell you and it was three hours ago. But don’t let that stop Shaun O’Hara from painting that beautifully vivid picture so GMFB fans can realize just how important Tom Brady’s retirement is. Remember when the President of the United States got his head blown off by a Cowboys fan? Well here’s another Irish Catholic that was put out to pasture. Remember when those buildings in New York fell? Well a lot of people in Indy did look at Tom Brady as a terrorist.

JFK’s Assassination. 9/11. Tom Brady’s first retirement. Tom Brady’s second retirement. Where were you?

What did reporters use as an analogy before 9/11? When MJ retired was Ahmad Rashad talking about him in the same breath as Pearl Harbor?


Good try by Pete Schrager trying to jump in there and save him.