Get a load of this guy:

Enough with this already. Pickleball is for 70 year olds who live at The Villages in Florida.

Watching Major League Pickleball is like watching four less-athletic Patrick Rafters stand at the net and play glorified ping pong.

Here’s a list of things that will happen before MLP challenges the NHL, MLB, or MLS:

  • we land astronauts on the surface of Pluto
  • 94 WIP talks Flyers
  • NBC stops showing cheesesteak shots on Sunday Night Football when the Eagles are playing
  • pigs fly
  • hell freezes over
  • Philadelphia elects a Republican mayor
  • Turkmenistan has a free and open election
  • Ben Simmons gets another triple double
  • PennDOT actually finishes a project
  • SEPTA updates their trains

It’s just not happening.