The Phillies are going to the playoffs, but we’re gonna get it back to the Eagles momentarily.

A.J. Brown is swearing off Takis after playing Monday night with an upset stomach:

“I must say my stomach was hurting. I ate some Takis last night. Never again. Never again.”

Takis are those rolled Dorito-looking things. They’re made by Barcel, which is a subsidiary of Mexico’s Bimbo. Same Bimbo on the Union shirts.

They make a couple of different flavors, like “Fuego,” “Blue Heat,” and “Salsa Brava.” If A.J. had actually considered the blurb on the company website, he may not have played the Bucs game with 2019 Sixers-esque gastroenteritis:

“Do you have what it takes to handle the intensity of Takis® rolled tortilla chips? Are you able to stand a crunchy bite of our full-on flavor? Because these are no ordinary corn chips. Oh, no. Takis Chips are only for the strong. The brave. The daring. So open a bag today and Face the Intensity.”

Jalen Hurts had flu-like symptoms in Tampa. A.J. Brown was feeling a little funky. But the Eagles still won by two touchdowns and Brown had his best game of the season. Nothing can stop this team. Not the sniffles, not the shits, and definitely not the Commanders. Birds moneyline, hammer it.