Heroes. Every last one of you:

This is the way. Those are people who had hate in their hearts for the D Backs at the start of the series and it didn’t stop until they went into the clubhouse to celebrate. Give them playoff tickets for life. The thought of beating traffic never occurred to them. I’m sure if anyone in Philadelphia actually watched the trophy presentation they could hear the deafening boos of these brave men and women on the broadcast. This is what Philadelphia has to get back to. Maybe we got too soft this year. The ovation, Dancing On My Own, the overalls, the funny home run dances, celebrations after every hit. Maybe we need a little course correction. We’re a little too run heavy right now and they’re stacking the box, forcing us to throw. A little bit of salt and a little bit of pepper. All this happy go lucky shit got us nowhere. We’ve got 10 championships to show for it when people thought we were mean, calloused, crotchety old fucks. It’s 10 more than we can say since we’ve apparently shed that tough exterior. I now re-blame The Athletic (with ads).

So if you’re reading this, next time you leave your house throw a battery at a Mets fan you see on the street. Rear end a guy on the highway with a Cowboys magnet and then kick their ass in lieu of exchanging insurance. Boo a Celtics fan in church. Let opposing fans know that the reports of our demise were greatly exaggerated. Our grandmas will still curse you out if you play for our rivals and our children will flip you off if you’re wearing another color they don’t recognize:

Seeing this video brings a smile to my face. The next generation has already seen enough losing and they are sick of it. The future is in good hands.

P.S. We’re so fucking back. I can hear these people already shaking in their boots for next season: