Another offseason. Another video of Jordan Mailata bringing the house down. This one at a more intimate show at The Green Parrot in Newtown, singing Valerie:

Imagine going to your neighborhood bar for a couple beers and UFC and Jordan Mailata randomly jumps on stage. I’d be wondering who roofied me.

Is it controversial if I say Valerie is on the Mount Rushmore of Karaoke songs? The Amy Winehouse version of course. It’s up there with Zombie, Wonderwall, and Ain’t No Mountain High Enough for my money. When I used to go to McGillin’s karaoke night I only wanted to pick songs that everyone could enjoy. I’m Garrett Stubbs. I didn’t have all the tools to be the greatest ever, but you’re damned if the vibes weren’t going to be high after I left the stage. Nothing worse than the guy who can rap the entire “Forgot About Dre.” Cool man. What’re you auditioning for Interscope Records? Is Jimmy Iovine over in the corner? We’re all drinking pitchers and eating chicken wings. This isn’t Coachella. Don’t be that guy. Nobody likes that guy. Stay in your lane and sing something we all know that’s not played out like Sweet Caroline or Don’t Stop Believing.

Here’s more background on the bar’s Instagram:

If you’re eagles 🦅 fans like us, this moment was just so surreal 💚

We played up at one of our favorite spots @greenparrotnewtown on Friday.

Around 10:45 PM we see a private room filling in with a party towards the back of the bar. We’re playing Whiskey Glasses by Morgan Wallen and I see this larger than life sized man just vibing. He’s singing a long, dancing, getting his friends all hyped up and into getting it. He’s just too far away for me to make out however.

As I’m watching the room, we see a lot more large athletic dudes vibing out. We knew this had to be a group of pro athletes. Then we find out by the staff that @jordanmailata is back there.

I get fired up, I play a John Legend song for him as I know he just saw him live in concert.

We then get approached by the staff that Jordan wants to sing a few songs with us. ‼️‼️

How can you say no to one of the most driven, nicest and humble people on the planet?

Then there he is right in front of us, making me feel like the size of Frodo Baggins from the Shire.

We start scheming with Jordan on what songs to play, Tennessee Whiskey gets thrown around, some Luke Combes. He almost decides to do Sugar We’re going down by fall out boy.

We end up doing Valerie, all the small things and the eagles fight song.

It was an awesome moment ; thank you #68 for being so fucking cool

Fly eagles fly baby 🦅

If there’s ever a guy who deserves hundreds of millions of dollars in the bank Jordan Mailata seems like that kind of guy. Just an all-around good dude who happens to be really really really good at protection schemes. Everyone looked like they were loving it except this girl:

Either she’s a Cowboys fan or she just faced six tequila shots and is doing her best to quiet the puke demons in her mind. The look she gave of pure disgust at one point makes it seem like she asked the band if she could sing a song and they said no. Just to then see some giant man take the mic and belt out the most beautiful rendition of Valerie these people have ever heard. Poor Tiffany.

Man I love the Parrot. I think I’m back in on chain bars after avoiding them for the last decade. I grew up on the Bee’s, Bennigan’s, and the occasional Pizzeria UNO. There’s only so many microwaved wings you can stomach so I became a snooty bitch after college. Now that beers are regularly $7 or $8 in Philly give me the Bee’s all day. I understand why middle America absolutely crushes Dollarita’s after a shift at the plant. It’s like Christmas when you see a $3.50 Miller Lite on the menu. Until Bob Casey gets the greedflation under control I’m officially back in on the chains and the Parrot is right at the top of the list. Where else can we see Gene Simmons on the strap? –

Hope the one off of 309 is still open for next time I go home.