Nothing gets her more in the mood than plate discipline:

Yea 400 foot moonshots are sick, but you know what really makes her dress hit the floor? Taking a 3-2 sinker right off the black for ball 4.

Imagine if this slogan catches on. Beer league softball around the city is about to be turned on it’s head. It’s gonna be a bunch of hungover burly dudes working walks. Scoring will be down, but on-base-percentage is going way way up and that’s sexy. If the Phillies start a winning streak while becoming submissive doms at the plate and plate discipline will become the mating call for every red-blooded man in Philadelphia for the rest of the season. Fellas she’d rather talk about Kyle Schwarber’s top-10 OBP rank than his top-10 home run marks.
Ladies won’t be subjected to tall tales about a guy’s senior year when he hit 14 bombs and had a 1.109 OPS in Legion. Those stories will be replaced with how he fought back from an 0-2 count, worked a walk, and started a third inning rally. You down with OBP? Yea you know me. LL Plate Discipline.

Keep this sign on the back burner when we need it in the playoffs once Nick Castellanos starts swinging at breaking balls in the other batter’s box again.