No one in the New York media and MLB knew what to do with Hawk Tuah girl when she threw out the first pitch at the Mets game Thursday. Because someone called Haliey Welch actually threw it:

Haliey Welch? Who the fuck is Haliey Welch? Referring to Hawk Tuah girl as Haliey Welch is like calling Kareem Abdul-Jabbar “Lew Alcindor” in regular conversation. You’re an asshole if you do that. Who was your favorite boxer as a kid, Cassius Clay? I bet you still call him Ron Artest instead of his preferred Metta World Peace. You probably announced in your fantasy league that you were taking Chad Johnson and not Chad Ochocinco that one year, you asshole. Spit on that thang and call her Hawk Tuah girl because that’s what she’ll always be until she’s six feet under.

The Mets beat writer at Newsday wasn’t even allowed to mention her in his write-up:

How did the Mets honor her? They spit on that thang and blew a five run lead:

Of course Mets fans and New York media lost their mind including Sal Licata, who unloaded on Hawk Tuah girl.


Ayyyyyooooooo:

I love the pearl clutching. Think of the children! That’s the difference between children raised by Mets fans and children raised by Phillies fans. Mets fans are raising their kids to be pussies. Phillies fans are taking their kids to games in a Hawk Tuah 2024 t-shirt they bought on the Wildwood boardwalk. We are not the same. Also who did Mets fans want, a franchise legend? It’s an afternoon game in the middle of the week against the Athletics.

Also know that every Mets fan who hated on Hawk Tuah girl Thursday also hates dogs and veterans. So now I have no choice but to hate you:

The only negative thing I’ll say about Hawk Tuah girl is that she messed up by not spitting on the ball before throwing the first pitch. Come on. That’s your moniker. Jordan has the Jumpman. LeBron has the silencer. Justin Jefferson hits the griddy every time he scores. You gotta Hawk Tuah on the ball and fire that thing in there. That’s your entire brand. What a miss from Haliey Welch.

P.S. This has to be the most white trash way Haliey has ever been spelled, right? Like that name came out of the womb smoking Reds and drinking moonshine. The name is so white trash it didn’t even make it into the white trash name scene in Ted: