
Every Eagles Fan Needs a Supportive Girlfriend Like Gigi Hadid
I want a love like Gigi Hadid and Bradley Cooper. If you’re not comforting me at my worst (the Rams driving down the field with two minutes left) then you don’t deserve me at my best (Saquon breaking off a 78-yard touchdown in the snow). This is why you date a woman half your age. The compassionate nature the Millennial has that Generation X was never fully able to express because they were the children of Boomers who didn’t talk about emotions:
I don’t know how long these two have been together – honestly I’m still pissed him and J-Law or Gaga never got together – but this is a big step for the couple. Do you remember the first time you took the girl you were dating to an Eagles game or the first time you both watched one together? It’s absolute madness. For the entire summer you tricked her into thinking you were a normal guy. But when the Fall rolls around that’s a different beast. The Eagles have Super Bowl aspirations and Nick Sirianni’s ass is firmly planted on the hot seat. You pored over the schedule, by yourself of course, the minute it came out and decided if they don’t start at least 4-2 you’re going to call in a bomb threat to NovaCare. And then the season finally rolls around, you’re getting more serious, and she asks you what you’re doing for the Eagles game. At that point right there the relationship will never be the same. She gets to see the way you treat millionaire players younger than you and harass geriatric referees who could be her grandpa. She starts to wonder why you hate guys named Joe Davis and Greg Olsen and overhears you mumbling things that would get you on a list about Tom Brady and Tony Romo. And who the hell is Dean Blandino and why doesn’t he blink? God forbid there’s a loss. Would you want to be with someone who reacts to losing by quietly sulking in their room? That’s why we all need a Gigi Hadid. She’s not invested in this game. She could probably care less as Coop’s heart is doing somersaults in his chest. But you know what? A little rub on the back just to let you know she’s there goes a long way. She doesn’t care you just threatened Jake Elliott’s life for missing another extra point. Go Sports!
I like that Bradley Cooper’s role in Silver Linings Playbook was actually just him: