Posts for Phillies Category

Phillies Fan Loses Wager, Hands Out Chicken Nuggets

Kevin Kinkead - September 20, 2017

The only thing better than a chicken nugget is a free chicken nugget.

And the only thing better than a free chicken nugget is eating it while watching the Phillies beat up on the Dodgers for a second-straight game.

A bunch of kids had that pleasure Tuesday night, thanks to a Phils fan who lost an online wager:

Damon Miller Jr. made his bet last Thursday, which held up for all of two innings. Rhys Hoskins belted a 91 MPH fast ball out of the park in the bottom of the second, good for his 18th homer in 34 games. The Phils won 10-0.

So Miller was now on the hook for nuggets, but the wager language was vague. Who is “everyone?” Does the entire stadium get nuggets? Are they coming from Chick-fil-A or Wendy’s or what?

Unlike overly-political celebrities, or that guy who promises to tattoo (subject) on his ass if (team) wins or loses a game, Miller actually followed through with some help from the Phillies. The team bought 50 boxes of McDonald’s nuggs and had Miller hand them out at the first base gate.

Miller spoke with The Good Phight about his experience:

“(The Phillies) set up the entire thing, which I’m extremely grateful for!”

“I was actually at the game when (Hoskins hit the home run) and my first reaction was I looked at my dad and said DID THAT JUST HAPPEN!? I OWE EVERYONE NUGGETS NOW!”

Good man, much better than Lena Dunham, who said she’d leave the country after Trump won the election. She’s still here.

It Looks Like A Beautiful Friendship Is Budding Between Freddie Mitchell and Lenny Dykstra

BWanksCB - September 20, 2017

I love Twitter. It’s the absolute best. It is the perfect way to get information, share thoughts, and interact with others who share similar interests. As sports fans, Twitter is great because it also provides us with a front-row seat to the insights and online interactions of current and former athletes. And sometimes, if we’re really lucky, we get to witness the insights and interactions between two absolutely BATSHIT crazy lunatics who feed off attention. I’m talking about like, say, a former Eagle first-round bust asking a former 1993 NL MVP runner-up and convicted felon why his former employer doesn’t like him batshit crazy.

Thus, I present to you, with commentary, the budding friendship playing out before our eyes via Twitter between Freddie Mitchell and Lenny Dykstra. Here is the tweet that got our attention:

As Chris Jastrzembski asked last night, why the Hell would Freddie Mitchell ask Lenny Dykstra, of all people, why the Eagles hate him so much? Because I fancy myself the people’s reporter, I decided to find out. Although yesterday’s bizarre exchange marked the bulk of interaction between the two, it seems the pair actually began bonding last week when Dykstra fired off this timely and nuanced tweet about Hurricane Irma: Continue Reading

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The Rest Of The Phillies Are Mashing As My Heart Continues To Sing For Rhys Hoskins

BWanksCB - September 15, 2017


-Any pitcher facing the Phillies between 2012 through, like, July of this year.

Well, well, well. It appears times have changed. Fast forward to last night, and here was a much different Phillies’ lineup, bolstered by exciting young talent, absolutely bludgeoning old friend Vance Worley off the mound at Citizen’s Bank Park. Poor bastard never stood a chance.

It took the Phillies all of four outs to bang out 10 hits and push nine runs across the plate. The rout underscores something that has gone basically overlooked as we’ve all marveled at Rhys Hoskins (more on him in a bit) for the past six weeks, which is that this entire offense is suddenly legit. It’s not hard to see why.

The lineup just doesn’t have many holes. Guys like Cesar Hernandez (four hits last night) and Freddy Galvis aren’t players that you want anchoring your lineup, but paired with dynamic bats in the middle of the order (Nick Williams, Aaron Altherr, Hoskins), they become nice complementary pieces. And when there is a guy who can do this out of the 8-hole, well, that’s pretty damn good:

“Shit. This guy is pretty good, too.”

-Any pitcher facing the Phillies between last month and 2027, probably.

Check out the following sequence from last night’s game:

That’s a relentless attack, and the data supports what we believe we’re seeing with our eyes. Here is how the Phillies’ offense stacks up against the rest of the National League since the All-Star Break:

Runs: 290 (3rd)

Hits: 556 (2nd)

Doubles: 116 (3rd)

Triples: 17 (1st)

Total Bases: 919 (2nd)

RBI: 276 (3rd)

Average: .269 (3rd)

Slugging %: .445 (3rd)

If you’re skeptical, you probably have thought A) Well, it’s only a 59-game sample size. B) There is expected regression, given the fact that the lineup is facing watered down pitching thanks to expanded rosters. C) Opposing pitchers will most certainly adjust to the approaches of the Phillies’ young hitters.

Valid points, I suppose. At the same time, shut up. Just enjoy this right now. At the very least, it appears the Phillies have the makings of what could be an above-average, if incomplete, lineup heading into next season. How general manager Matt Klentak handles a surplus of infielders (there’s only four spots to play Galvis, Hernandez, J.P. Crawford, Maikel Franco, and Scott Kingery) will be one of the more compelling storylines of the offseason.

With that out of the way, it seems ridiculous to write 350+ words about the Phillies’ offense and not get in my daily slobber of Rhys Hoskins. So without further ado, BOOM: Continue Reading

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Rhys Hoskins Is More Of A Man Than Me, You, All Of Us

BWanksCB - September 13, 2017

Rhys Hoskins continues to do crazy shit on a baseball field. I guess that’s a somewhat elementary way to describe what we’re witnessing right now, but, I mean, come on, we’re out of superlatives here.

Last night, Hoskins saw 10 total pitches during his first two plate appearances, didn’t swing at a single one, and drew two walks.

Did he demonstrate a patient and mature approach that’s completely disproportionate to his actual experience? Indeed. But what he really did was lull the unsuspecting Marlins into a false sense of security. By the time the rookie strolled to the plate in the 7th inning, Miami reliever Dustin McGowan actually convinced himself that Hoskins wouldn’t become the fastest player ever to hit his 15th career home run.

Whoops. Continue Reading

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You Take the Good with the Bad with Odubel Herrera

Kyle Scott - September 9, 2017

I call this post dichotomy.

Last night, Odubel worked a tough first inning walk in which he got under the skin of fiery goofball Max Scherzer with some antics that contained the general hue of Lenny Dykstra (more on him later):

Scherzer’s government-issued cage was so rattled that he walked the next batter on four pitches before giving up a three-run blast to Nick Williams (this team is fun again!)… followed by Maikel Franco popping out on the first pitch the next at-bat.

Anyway, the point is Herrera set the table and the Phillies ate. The problem, however, is that rather than clean the dishes, serve dessert or offer an AFTER-DINNER COCKTAIL, Herrera woefully misplayed a line drive and then walked to the ball on an INSIDE-THE-PARK-GRAND SLAM: Continue Reading

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Brett Myers’ New Music Video Is The Most Redneck Thing Ever

Kyle Scott - September 7, 2017

Brett Myers’ country music career seems to be doing well.*

*No it doesn’t. This video only has 1,400 views.

His latest, uh, rock anthem, an homage to beer, ‘shine, and cut-off jorts features the full-deck of redneck imagery. It’s like the storyboard called for the shoot to take place at a Trump rally, during a white supremacists march, in a field, something something Joe Francis. The video manages to squeeze in every redneck trope and then some: Continue Reading

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Crawford Cometh

Tyler Trumbauer - September 4, 2017

The Lehigh Valley IronPigs wrapped up their 2017 regular season on Monday with a 4-3 win, clinching the team a spot in the Triple-A playoffs. Some thought the Pigs making the playoffs would keep Crawford, who was still waiting that shot in the Show, in the minors for just a bit longer, but it does not appear so:

Crawford isn’t shedding any tears about leaving the team and missing the postseason:

Crawford struggled early in the season, but turned it on in the latter half of the year and had a big hand in getting the team to the postseason on Monday with this homer early in the game:

He has been playing a bit at third base in the last few weeks, so we’ll see if he gets a shot there with the Phillies. He cannot do any worse than the current starter there, can he?

Rhys Hoskins Is Saving My Baseball Fandom

Timothy Reilly - September 4, 2017

Rhys Hoskins made his major league debut on a pleasant August evening in Philadelphia. It was the kind of night that, not long ago, would have coaxed a capacity crowd to come to Citizens Bank Park and cheer on the heroes who delivered the city its only major championship in the last 34 years.

Those heroes are gone now. The fans have largely disappeared from the stadium as well, the roars they once generated dwindling to silent indifference or mild annoyance that occasionally rises to half-hearted applause when the latest curiosity from Allentown makes his first appearance in the big leagues. There has simply been little to enjoy about the Phillies since the franchise commenced its long journey to the basement of the National League after the abbreviated 2011 playoff run.

The offense remains largely punchless; the 2017 squad has barely cleared the low bar that the awful 2016 team set. Maikel Franco remains a disappointment; a .224 batting average and -1 WAR would be unacceptable for a bench player, let alone the putative cornerstone of the franchise. Tommy Joseph has shown he has some pop in his bat, but he’s hitting under .200 against lefthanders. Odubel Herrera has been playing well, but a recent trip to the disabled list has detoured his 2017 campaign. Aaron Altherr can’t stay healthy. Cameron Rupp looks like the cleanup hitter on your beer league softball team. César Hernandez has proven a capable contact hitter, but his inability to steal bases at a consistent rate mitigates his impact as a leadoff man. Nick Williams is still young and unproven. And the rest of the bunch are too unremarkable at the plate to warrant specific mention. Continue Reading

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