Phillies

The Phillies Celebrated Zack Wheeler’s 10 MLB Years with Catered McDonald’s

By Kyle Pagan

Published: Jun 14th, 2023 · 2:45 PM EDT

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This story comes from Matt Gelb at The Athletic (with ads):

As Phillies clubhouse employees prepared a celebration for Zack Wheeler last weekend, his catcher intervened. The team had ordered a cake to mark Wheeler’s achievement — 10 years of big-league service time. But J.T. Realmuto was thinking bigger.

“You can’t just get him a cake,” Realmuto said to the clubbies. “You have to get him McDonald’s.”

…

“He’s one of the only guys in the clubhouse who eats that way,” Realmuto said. “One of the only Major League Baseball players who probably eats that way.”

So, the postgame spread was a feast catered by McDonald’s — Double Cheeseburgers, McNuggets and french fries….

Zack Wheeler looking at the spread in the clubhouse:

via @WhiteHouse on Twitter

What an asshole Zack Wheeler is, huh? A 33-year-old Cy Young-caliber pitcher on a well balanced diet of double cheeseburgers and McNuggets. We didn’t know it at the time, but the dude was sweating burger grease on the bump with a no hitter into the 8th last week. Some guys just have it all.

I turned 30 and my metabolism just went like the engine in a used Camry. I eat one cheeseburger and my ass jiggles for a week. Anyone reading this with a metabolism blessed by the Gods, take full advantage of it while you still can. One day that weekend beer binge and Taco Bell will catch up to you, and fast. Long gone will be the days of doing a couple crunches, a couple pushups, and the sauna at the gym and come out looking svelte. You’re going to work your ass off and somehow gain weight.

Shout out to JT here, too. BCIB for a reason. Great listener too, that guy. Who cares about a cake? Cake sucks – unless it’s ice cream cake. When you did something good in my family the reward was always McDonald’s.

P.S. – Who do you think showed the guys in the clubhouse the McGangBang? Definitely Garrett Stubbs. Then he couldn’t stop saying McGangBang for the rest of the night.