I’ve decided that I’m going to pick on Andrew Bynum today. First up, this video from Joe Conklin (with art by Kevin Lofton) featuring Dora The Explorer Bynum, Charles Barkley, Allen Iverson and Ilya Bryzgalov.
It’s been a few hours since Charles Barkley last said something hilarious. So, he was due.
Asked about Tiger Wood’s somewhat indifferent reaction to Greg Norman’s comments that Tiger was intimidated by Rory McIlroy – Woods jokingly responded by calling Rory The Intimidator – Barkley had this to say on a Chicago sports talk radio station: [the full quote, for your humorical pleasure]
“I got to tell you something, I’m disappointed in Tiger. You know, how long is he going to let anyone say anything about him? Like, I would like for him to just blast Greg Norman. He saw all the stuff he’s been through these last few years, he’s got to realize– like dude, these people really don’t like you even though you made them a gazillion dollars. That situation gave everybody a chance to dump on you, and he still tries to take the high road. You know, I’m not a high road guy. I wanted him to come out and really blast Greg Norman. Like dude, what the hell are you talking about? I got a lot more victories than you. I got a ton more majors than you.
I don’t understand why he just lets people treat him any type of way. I really don’t. I wish he would just go ballistic on Greg Norman. You can’t just let people say anything to you about you when you’re minding your own business. Tiger’s always taking the high road, so everybody dumps on him about the marriage stuff. He’s been struggling for the last few years. Everybody’s been dumping on him. Now he’s having a terrific year. He’s won three times, he’s having a great year. Obviously he didn’t win a major, I’m very cognizant of that. But like, you just can’t say anything about that kid you want to. I wish I could just put some of my blackness in him.
That means, like, hey man… toughness. And I’m not talking about that mental golf toughness. Like, hey man, you can’t just say anything to me.
Like, when I got arrested eight times for fighting, I was like dude, just cause I’m Charles Barkley you can’t disrespect me anyway, and I have slapped the hell out of fans before. Listen, I’m gonna respect the fans, and 90% of the fans are great, but you just can’t say anything to me anytime you want to. When a fan threw a drink on me, and I chased him through a bar. When I caught him, I rammed his damn head through the window. Know what I told the judge [when he asked if I regretted it?] I said I regret we were on the first damn floor. Are you kidding me? You can’t just throw no drink on me.
It’s just crazy. Like, Tiger’s minding his own business, he’s on the comeback trail, and this guy comes out the woodwork. You can’t just say anything to anybody. I don’t believe that.”
Listen to the audio over at The Big Lead.
Charles Barkley is hosting SNL this week. Here's his promo with Bill Hader, who is underratedly funny. And this would be the post you can comment on to opine about how SNL just isn't funny anymore, which it is– they've had a good season.
And it went exactly how you would expect a Charles Barkley trip to Roach and O’Brian’s in Haverford to go. Reader Jeff passes along the details via the Tweets: He says Sir Charles was great and bought everyone in the bar two rounds of shots. His method?
“Everyone at the bar shots. And if they don't want one, tell them to go fuck themselves.” – Sir Charles Barkley
Outstanding. Barkley and his wife showed up just before midnight. Chuck was the life of the party, according to Jeff. We would expect nothing less.
A few more pics after the bump.
Mandy Housenick, who does a good job covering the Phillies for the Allentown Morning Call, wrote this in her blog about her encounter with Charles Barkley in the Phillies clubhouse. I'll let you be the judge.
Barkley was a guest commentator for the game on TBS.
Covering professional baseball, I've seen my share of big guys, including Derek Lowe, CC Sabathia, Ryan Howard, etc.
Today, though, the man I saw was in a class by himself: Charles Barkley.
That dude was big.
shook hands before he left the clubhouse and my hand got lost in his.
He was so thick.
Wow! Being 5-foot-2, makes me glad I don’t cover the
NBA! My boots with 4-inch heals that I wear in the winter and fall
wouldn’t help me out much.
To be fair, we asked Housenick about her choice of words and she told us to get our heads out of the gutter, but we couldn't resist.
Charles was on with John Clark of NBC Philadelphia and, among other things, he calls Howard Eskin a nut (like it) and says how he will wear a Redskins jersey to the Linc.
Fun starts around 5:10.
Unfortunately, the fringe lunatic Eagles fan will take offense to this, and the rest of us will just enjoy seven minutes of Barkley opining.