The summer of 2026 should be a good one.
Yeah, it’s a long way away, but we’re talking about America’s 250th birthday. We’ve got the Major League Baseball All-Star Game in town and the PGA Championship is coming back to Aronimink. We might get a World Cup game, too.
Today Philly launched its official bid to be a host city for 2026, the World Cup tournament that will be played in Canada, Mexico, and the United States. There are 23 cities interested in hosting right now, which will be ultimately narrowed down to 16 total, including 10 in the USA, three in Canada, and three in Mexico.
Here’s our competition, with my notes in parentheses explaining why Philly is a better choice:
- Atlanta (basically just a big suburb)
- Baltimore (small beans town, not big enough)
- Boston (disgusting sports fans, disgusting sports teams, losers everywhere)
- Cincinnati (whatever city)
- Dallas (home of the Cowboys)
- Denver (great city, bad altitude for 90 minutes of running)
- Houston (too hot)
- Kansas City (too boring)
- Los Angeles (horrible traffic)
- Miami (people more concerned about night life)
- Nashville (people more concerned about country music)
- New York/New Jersey (armpit of America, home of Giants and Jets)
- Orlando (can’t be taken seriously as a sports town)
- San Francisco Bay Area (too expensive)
- Seattle (too many hippies)
- Washington, D.C. (too many politicians)
Clearly, Philadelphia is an easy choice to host a 2026 World Cup game. If we lose out to some shit town like Cincy or Baltimore, we riot.
Some details of the bid, via the official campaign website, after the jump: