Posts for joe

Crossing Streams Podcast (Episode 3): Joe Vallee, Author of “A Snowball’s Chance”

Kyle Scott - March 26, 2013

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Perhaps I should have had the guy who created the pissing urinal game on Crossing Streams.

Next time.

Joe Vallee joined me for the third show. He is the lead author of A Snowball’s Chance, a new book calling out the national media for their mistreatment of Philly fans. It’s an outstanding takedown of the numerous stereotypes that exist, with contributions from many local media folks and sports figures, including Ray Didinger, Mike Missanelli, Howard Eskin, Dan Baker, Michael Barkann, Larry Andersen, Jim Jackson, Scott Franzke and others. The book’s closing remarks were, fittingly, written by Brad Lidge.

We talked about the book and the many incidents it details: throwing snowballs at Santa, batteries at J.D. Drew, Flyers fans booing an anti-cancer PSA, and other occurrences that are on the national media’s checklist for throwing Philly fans under the bus. We also discussed the years of disappointment that goes into being a Philly sports fan and other incidents from fans all over the country that get overlooked.

Joe was a batboy for the 1993 Phillies and shared some stories about being in the dugout with the greatest bunch of throwbacks ever assembled. He also told the story of tracking down Lidge last summer, while Lidge was in the process of moving back to Colorado, and talking with him for an hour about Philly sports fans. And then there are the legal troubles that Joe's site,, has found itself in thanks to overzealous lawyers from

I’d highly recommend you grab a copy A Snowball’s Chance on Amazon. You can find Joe out and about promoting the book, and on Facebook and Twitter (@Philly2Philly).


Listen here.

We’re not in iTunes yet, but that link will work on your iPhone. Listen to past episodes of Crossing Streams here.


Show notes:

Terry Mulholland’s no-hit, no-run game 

Phillies fans throw batteries at J.D. Drew

Frank Olivo smiles about having snowballs thrown at him, when he was Santa

Flyers fans boo anti-cancer PSA

Joe Banner is So Entirely Full of Shit

Kyle Scott - January 21, 2013

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Joe Banner, who missed out on hiring Chip Kelly ostensibly because he works for the Browns, and who sword-fought with Jeffrey Lurie by way of Reuben Frank last week, told Peter King that the Browns didn't really want Kelly anyway:

"We removed ourselves from the process. We really liked Chip. He's intriguing, a very different thinker, and very smart. But you could see he was uncertain what he wanted to do. He may be in Philadelphia 10 years or longer and have a terrific career. But the fact he committed to Tampa Bay last year, backed out, then seemed all year to be leaning toward going to the NFL, then being so uncertain with us, we just felt it was too big a gamble. If there was no ambivalence, we may have offered him the job.'' 


OK, Joe. And Mitt Romney didn’t want to be President.

You removed yourself from the process like a nerdy kid in high school removed himself from a Seven Minutes in Heaven closest.

Jeffrey Lurie and Joe Banner May Be Engaging in a Pissing Contest for the Ages

Kyle Scott - January 18, 2013

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Does this hat make me look like a penis?

You remember that scene in Austin Powers 2 where Scott Evil got jealous when Dr. Evil started treating Mini Me like a son, something Dr. Evil never did with Scott?

Yeah, that. That’s kind of how I imagine Joe Banner feels about the relationship between Jeffrey Lurie and Howie Roseman. 

Earlier this week, a story by Jason La Canfora of CBS Sports painted Roseman as an incompetent roadblock to the Eagles hiring a new coach. It was obviously wrong, since Roseman has been credited with sealing the deal with Chip Kelly (a modern day Scott Proefrock, Roseman is). In the story, La Canfora cited unnamed sources who said that coaching candidates hated Roseman. One of the sources was thought to be Banner, who is now with the Browns.

Lurie was among those who thought Banner was the source.

Speaking to CSN’s Reuben Frank, Lurie put forth the following:

“I’m very supportive of Howie, and if there’s any criticism coming from afar about Howie, it’s just off-base, and so I will support Howie completely, because that’s not right,” Lurie said.
“And, you know, if there are league sources that are really based in Cleveland, that’s not right. We see through it all.”


Banner caught wind of those comments and, well, he wasn’t happy about them:

“It is always difficult to comment on a quote that may or may not be accurate or in context. In this case, from the comments which Jeffrey made that were communicated to me, it is necessary for me to make this clear, unambiguous statement. Any implication that I had anything to do with Jason La Canfora’s story is completely false, outrageous and borders on being libelous.

“I had absolutely no conversation with Jason La Canfora. Having demonstrated my character over the last 44 years to Jeffrey and the last 14 to Howie, it is beyond disappointing that they would suggest such a thing. As tempting as it is to go further, other than defending myself, I will continue to take the high road on all such matters as I have since the day I left the Eagles.”


This probably won’t be the last we hear about this feud. After all, Roseman did kill Banner the first chance he got.

Know Your Loon: Andrew Bynum, in Two Parodies

Kyle Scott - December 18, 2012

Andrew Bynum, who thinks he is better than Dwight Howard, hasn’t played a game yet this season, but he is feeling better. A little bit, at least. So, to commemorate his progress, Joe Conklin recorded this parody to We Need A Little Christmas: Bynum Feels A Little Better, which was played on the WIP Morning Show this, um, morning. I laughed. He hasn't played a single game, except for a few bowling frames.

Full disclosure: Though we are currently advertising Conklin’s new comedy DVD, this post in not sponsored (of course, we highly recommend you buy one).

Meanwhile, the folks over at The Basketball Jones put together A Very NBA Christmas, and Bynum's knees, of course, make an appearance at around the 1:20 mark:

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Watch the video after the jump

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Sponsored: Tell Us Your Most Memorable Andy Reid Moment, Win Joe Conklin’s New Comedy DVD

Kyle Scott - December 10, 2012


Following the first Eagles win in over two months, but still assuming that Andy Reid will be fired after the season, we thought it would be a good time to ask you for your most memorable (good or bad) moment in the Andy Reid era… with the help of the comedic stylings of Joe Conklin. 

Released just in time for Christmas, Conklin’s new DVD, Voices In My Head, is a collection of Joe’s best material from over 20 years of bringing celebrity voices to the stage and screen. It also features a never before seen stand-up performance from September, a behind-the-scenes look at Conklin’s work for WIP, and other classic videos. You can see more at!


Want to win a copy? Between now and end of day today (Monday), comment on this post with your most memorable or favorite Andy Reid moment (good or bad, no more than a few sentences). The most thoughtful or entertaining response will win a signed copy of Voices In My Head. Be sure to leave your email address so we can notify you if you’ve won. 

Don’t feel like waiting and want to get the DVD for yourself or give one (or 10) as a gift? You can buy the DVD for $14.99 on Amazon or pick one up at Ponzio’s Diner in Cherry Hill. 

Audio: Joe Conklin’s King Dunlap Song

Kyle Scott - November 14, 2012

I truly hate King Dunlap as a football player. So, anytime someone wants to ridicule him through holiday song – in this case Joe Conklin on the WIP Morning Show – we’re going to post it. To the sidelines he runs, timeouts are done, this guy is so dumb.

Audio courtesy WIP

In Other News: Joe Banner Named Browns President

Kyle Scott - October 16, 2012

In impeccably timed news, reports came out that former Eagles president Joe Banner will take over for Mike Holmgren as the Browns' president. This happened just before the Eagles announced that Juan Castillo was fired. Or, just after Juan Castillo was fired. It’s hard to tell.

Banner, who fled the sinking ship, NovaCare Complex, just in time, was expected to take over Holmgren’s position when it was announced that Banner was part of the team’s new ownership group.

Carry on.

Al Pacino May Play Joe Paterno in a Movie

Kyle Scott - September 8, 2012

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So when you casted that Penn State movie in your head, did you have Al Pacino as candidate to play Joe Pa? I did. reports that Pacino may play Paterno in a movie that is currently being shopped in Hollywood based on Sports Illustrated writer Joe Posnanski’s recent biography, Paterno. More:

The narrative arc of the movie that will be shopped is obvious. A man becomes the winningest coach in college football history and builds a powerhouse football program that turns him into a campus deity. When his former defensive coordinator Jerry Sandusky is revealed to be a pedophile and it comes out Paterno was told and helped hide the scandal, the coach was summarily fired.


Interestingly, the first movie to be made here could focus on Paterno, not the Sandusky allegations themselves. From a storytelling perspective, that might be the better feature film – hero coach turned enemy – instead of a near docudrama about the facts surrounding Sandusky and his crimes (that might be better reserved for TV). admits that it’s still very early in the process, so don’t expect to see the movie anytime soon. If it gets made at all. The real challenge, I suppose, will be filming it before Pacino joins Joe Pa at the big crusty, Italian guy lounge in the sky.