A tipster wrote to us to blow up Jung Ho Kang’s Tinder game while he’s in town playing the Phillies — she (or he) said: “I know publicizing someone’s online game is bad form,” so I guess she’s not an avid a reader — and we have to say: not bad. Cocky enough to post a stock photo of yourself on the field, but not cocky enough to pay for that photo and remove the watermark. We feel ya, Jung Ho. I wouldn’t buy that picture either.
It looks like even if Ruben Amaro is still evaluating and hesitant to selling, that won’t stop the rumors and “inside sources”: According to MLB Daily Dish, quoting a source with “knowledge of the situation,” A.J. Burnett will likely be a Pirate once again before July 31st.
Burnett is 5-7 with a 3.89 ERA in seventeen starts for the Phillies this year, but that ERA would be the second-best among the Pirates’ regular rotation. Plus, maybe they just miss him, he seems likable. The Daily Dish continued, saying “though Burnett can block trades to 21 major league teams, major league sources indicate that the Pirates are one of the nine teams on his ‘acceptable assignment’ list,” so maybe he misses them too.
Dateline Pittsburgh (CB) — You fucking Yinzers you.
When the mustache-rocking urban planners of Pittsburgh decided to put PNC Park at the foot of one of the city’s 3.6 million bridges, they probably never took into account that, one day, the Pirates might play a game that actually meant something and that, win or lose, the bridge would serve as a tempting predominantly steel structure with which to celebrate or kill one’s self.
The Pirates won last night, so it was the former in that scenario.
Behold, a Yinzer jumping off Clemente Bridge following the Pirates win over the Reds:
But hey, good news– it’s not like that river is polluted or anything:
High levels of an ultra-salty compound that could be linked to oil and gas drilling persist in the Allegheny River’s Pittsburgh-area watershed, while the levels declined in the nearby Monongahela River, recent research shows.
Officials at public water utilities in both watersheds grew concerned in 2009 and 2010 when bromide levels soared during a surge of Marcellus Shale gas drilling. Although not considered a pollutant by themselves, the bromides combine with chlorine used in water treatment to produce compounds that can threaten public health.
A recent Pittsburgh Water and Sewer Authority report found that high levels of bromides persisted this year in the Allegheny just downstream from industrial brine treatment plants. The plants accept wastewater from oil and gas drilling and other industrial activities.
Oh.
That guy just sprouted fifth and sixth limbs, making him the third most peculiar male in his lineage.
A Heinz Ketchup bottle dumping into a shithole in the outfield at PNC Park as an allegory for Pittsburgh makes Plato's Cave look like the nonsensical scribblings of a mad man
A sewer pipe under PNC Park clogged today and crews had to dig up the outfield to get in there and clean the shit out (quite literally).
WPXI reports the clog was fixed at around 2 p.m.
Team officials said the field will be repaired by the time the Pirates return home on Monday. They also noted that the outfield in Pittsburgh has been covered by shit for nearly two decades now, so the incident shouldn’t have any effect on the game.
via Deadspin
I should tell you that this post is being written live from a Panera Bread, where a man, who I don’t know, decided that roughly 18 open tables didn’t suit his needs and he would plug his computer in and sit at my table, across from me.
So I bring you this story while sharing a desk with a man I’ve never met. If my words suddenly come to halt, either John Quinones showed up… or I’m dead.
…
Yinzers ripped a PNC Park security guard’s finger off this weekend.
Really.
A Pittsburgh Post-Gazette story tells us about Rachel George, 21, and her father, Christopher, 50, who attacked a security guard and police officer while Rachel was being escorted out of the stadium after she was caught smoking in her seat. Things got out of hand rather quickly:
As Pirates security supervisor Joseph Risher was escorting her out of the right field gate, Ms. George's unidentified boyfriend assaulted him and ran off. Ms. George jumped on the guard's back and started to pull him backward, the complaint says.
Her father joined in the attack, pushing him up against a fence.
"While defending himself, Mr. Risher got his left hand caught on the fence, and when he was pulled by both (defendants) his left middle finger was ripped off at the second knuckle and was hanging by a piece of skin," Detective Rende wrote in the complaint.
A police officer also injured his shoulder while placing Rachel in a stadium holding cell (yep, other cities have them too).
Mr. Risher’s finger was later reattached during surgery.
Classic Shittsburgh right there, folks. I mean, from their look to the act. Smoke-stained, greasy dirty blonde hair? Check. Rustic handlebar mustache accompanied by hollow, lonely eyes? Yep. Getting kicked out of a stadium for puffing on a cigg then assaulting a security guard and ripping off his fucking finger? Oh you bet. A three rivers trifecta right there.
Sadly, this won’t live on in sports infamy, but if it happened in Philly it surely would.
H/T to readers Adam, Steve, Dave, and the guy sitting acr
Photo source: Zimbio
Step aside, baseball's best team. Pennsylvania has a new contender, and its fans are ugly.
Playing in a crappy division brings with it many delusions. The Pittsburgh Pirates, just five games over .500 and 1/2 a game out of first, look to be buyers at this year's trade deadline. According to thePittsburgh Tribune Review – via Hardball Talk – the Buccos are interested in none other than Hunter Pence.
The feeling may be mutual: [Pittsburgh Tribune Review]
That notion was endorsed yesterday by Houston Astros right fielder Hunter Pence, whom the Pirates have scouted with the July 31 non-waiver trade deadline in mind.
"Everyone's been talking about (the Pirates)," Pence said yesterday morning before the Pirates beat the Astros, 7-5, in 11 innings at Minute Maid Park. "They're right up there in the standings and they've been there for 90 games. They have the pitching, and that's key.
"Who knows? We play the season hoping to see Cinderella stories. It's fun to watch. Whatever moves are made, we'll see what happens. But they've already got a great team and they're competing."
Jokes aside, the Pirates have played the Phillies tough over the last couple of years and are a potential first round matchup (if the season were to end today, the Phillies would play the NL Central winner).
Craig Calcaterra at Hardball Talk points out that Ed Wade is essentially a lame-duck GM right now and may not be so moved to make a rebuilding type deal. Of course, knowing that Wade probably won't be in Houston much longer, we can always wish for him to give Ruben Amaro his friends and family discount, something I'm not convinced he hasn't been doing all along. Brad Lidge. Roy Oswalt.
With news that Michael Cuddyer may not be on the trading block, Pence may be the only right-handed bat out there who could make a significant impact on the Phillies' lineup. Is anyone feverishly beating that drum yet? If not, I'll start to.
Pence is a good fielder, has two years of arbitration left, and he's gangly and awkward. We like that. Beat. Beat.
Morning Wood is a hard news roundup for your Philadelphia Phillies. Good or bad, it will show up every morning.
The Phillies lost, 2-1, in extras. Photo gallery… hither.
Charlie Manuel defended the decision to keep Rule 5 Michael Martinez on the roster. Chuck said he wants to give Chase periodic rest (even if it's late in games), and M-Mart (might as well give him a nickname now since he's here to stay) allows them to do that. Scott Proefrock also said that the Phillies wanted to give Mayberry consistent at-bats in triple-A.
Both Brian Schneider and Brad Lidge suffered minor setbacks in their rehab. Schneider tweaked his leg while running the bases in extended spring training. His return will be further delayed. Brad Lidge felt shoulder soreness after throwing in an extended spring training game. That is not uncommon, given the fact this is the first time he has thrown a lot since early in spring training.
Charlie Manuel remains confident about the lineup: [Delco Times]
“I think that lineup is going to hit. That lineup has to hit,” Manuel said. “I’ve got confidence in those guys hitting, I’ve seen them four or five, some of them six and seven years. I see no reason why they won’t hit. We can get started any time we want to, though. That’s how I look at.”
Of course, they haven't hit in, like, two years. It should be noted that last night was only the 16th time since the beginning of last year that the Phillies have had their entire lineup together. They have been the best team in baseball during that timeframe.
After playing left field for much of the season at single-A, Phillies top prospect Jonathan Singleton will move back to first base.
The Phillies will look for 65-70 pitches out of Kyle Kendrick today.
The Mets lost their sixth straight home game when leading in the seventh inning or later. Amazing.
Oh look, a not-Phillies fan being tased at a baseball game.
Pittsburgh is the worst place on earth, folks. At last night's Pirates game, this jorts-wearing guy (is that a Starter jacket?) was tasered and clubbed by police. I'd also like to note that he was significantly more violent and threatening than Steve Consalvi. He did receive the tase (?) a bit better, though. Of course, beating him senselessly with a club may not have been the best idea.
But this shouldn't come as a surprise to you. Oh no. Perhaps you remember our review of Pittsburgh from last summer. We easily spotted men with tails and women in Carolina jerseys. The USA Starter jacket seen here is an upgrade, reserved for only the most revered steel workers. We also saw a Pirates fan throw up on the back of a Phillies fan. Aftermath captured here.
Let's see the national media run with this one.
via Deadspin
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