Posts for red

Was Bryce Harper a Douchebag Today?

Kyle Scott - October 10, 2012

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Photo: MLB

Well, perhaps not.

Brycecakes is wearing red contacts today, allegedly because they help to reduce glare from the sun monster in Washington. That's something that Jayson Werth has complained about previously. So, thats the official stance. The unofficial stance – mine – is that the Nationals handed out red rally towels today as part of some sort of red out and Harper is trying yet another unnecessary gimmick under the guise of keeping the sun out of his eyes. You decide.

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via The Big Lead

This Wasn’t The First Time Claude Giroux Performed “The Datsyuk” in Toronto

Kyle Scott - March 11, 2012

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(The dates in the video screenshot are wrong)


The Flyers beat the Leafs in a shootout last night, 1-0. That you know. Claude Giroux dangled little drops of ginger for his team's final shot. You likely know that, too. Bryz had his third shutout in his last four games. You know that, as well.

But thanks to reader Patrick, who possesses an uncanny ability to archive Flyers preseason shootout attempts in his head, we now know that this wasn’t the first time Claude Giroux tried “The Datsyuk” in a shootout in Toronto. Related: It's also not the first time legions of Canadian women were spontaneously impregnated when the Flyers were north of the border.

Here’s what Giroux told reporters after the game:

“It’s a move I’ve been practicing, and I thought it was a good opportunity to try it.” 

“[I call it] The Datsyuk, I saw him do it a couple times. He’s got some pretty sick moves, so I saw him do it. I’ve been working on it since I’m younger.”


Yeah, like September 24, 2010, when G also scored with it against the Leafs (the date in the video was wrong– it was the 24th).

Not to be overshadowed by Giroux, Bryz, who once again didn’t want to talk about himself after the game, stoned everyone, including all-star Phil Kessel on both a breakaway in overtime and in the shootout.  

Some stats on Bryz courtesy of the Flyers' city-leading PR department:

Ilya Bryzgalov’s shutout streak is at 136:13.  Bryzgalov has allowed two goals in his last 255:21 dating back to the third period of the Islanders game on March 1.  He has stopped 135 of 137 shots during that span. 


After the jump are four videos: Giroux’s sick move (both from 2010 and last night), a highlight reel of Bryzgalov saves, and Bryz and Giroux speaking to reporters post-game.

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Phillies Fan Will Face Tim Lincecum in Spring Training Next Year

Kyle Scott - October 26, 2011

It figures. It figures that a Phillies fan would win this Red Bull contest to face Tim Lincecum.

Fist bump to Buzz on Broad for catching this SF Gate story about the guy who won the right (privilege?) to bat against Timmay by best imitating the Giants pitcher’s delivery.

The winner? Lance Lampert (unfortunate), whose friends call him “Lancecum” (get it?). He is a 20-year-old from Philadelphia who gets to face Lincecum at spring training next year and will presumably be wearing a Phillies hat when he does. Which means we can fully expect L squared to get buried 0-2 before chasing a slider in the dirt.

Anyway, good luck to Lance. Pretty cool opportunity.

Do You Want to Watch the Red Sox Collapse in Real Time?

Kyle Scott - September 30, 2011

Sura ya do!

Well, edited real-time, but you get the gist. Watch this before it gets removed from YouTube. Video link from the amazing Steve Whyno.

Video: Girl Gives Female Red Sox Friend Handy With Giant Red Fist

Kyle Scott - June 29, 2011

And if it comes, it comes.

I'm telling you, there really needs to be a screening process for the folks sitting behind home plate in direct sight of oft-used cameras. During the 19 inning affair, we had air-cunilingus and boob grabbing. Last night? She-jobs.

I… I make a sad. Jeff Carter used to love this stuff:


Recapping J-Roll’s™ Ridiculous Red Bull Ad

Kyle Scott - June 27, 2011

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What a clusterfuck. While most of the other mainstream media folks and bloggers will wax poetic about today's event, we'll tell you how fucking ridiculous it was.

Let’s set the scene: Ben Franklin Parkway on a Monday afternoon. Around 1,000 people line the street to watch our five foot eight shortstop attempt to break a record held by the fattest, slobbiest, power hitter of all-time, Babe Ruth. 

Our protagonist's tools? A hollowed out aluminum bat and some jacked up baseballs that would make Acme jealous.

The cause? A boatload of cash from his sponsor, Red Bull. Oh yeah, history, too.

Swag? On.

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Presumably J-Roll's™ transportation to the event

I didn’t have a credential for this one, so I set myself up along the waist-level fence, just a few feet behind the other media folk in attendance. Luckily for me, J-Roll™ decided that trying to hit 600 feet to straight-away center – or, in this case, the 75-foot wide Parkway – would be a difficult task. The Red Bull folks adjusted the plate so it was pointed at a 45 degree angle… or, as I’d like to mention, directly at my face.

That’s right, why not line up 1,000 people around what would normally be second base to watch a Major Leaguer use an aluminum bat to smoke jacked up baseballs with all his might? Sounds safe.

About five minutes before Mick Billmeyer began serving up meatballs to J-Roll™, a Red Bull employee bum-rushed me to get to the railing I was leaning on. In his hand, a cardboard sign informing spectators that they accept all risk of injury by standing in such close proximity to a batting practice on steroids.

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Jimmy Rollins is Going to Attempt to Hit a Ball Farther Than Any Man Has Before

Kyle Scott - June 21, 2011


Hey, what is the most logical thing for our five foot eight leadoff hitter, who is in the final year of his contract and coming off an injury-plagued season, to do on a Monday afternoon in June? Attempt to break the Guinness World Record for longest batted ball, that's what.

[Apparently GWR is no longer called "Book of World Records," because, ya know, people can get that stuff online now.]

Last night, J-Roll™ Tweeted a link to the press release for his Red Bull dick-swinging-fest, which will take place next Monday at 11:45 A.M.:

Clear your lunch hour because we’re not just talking home runs here…Rollins is aiming beyond the typical stadium distance and looking to hit a massive 550-foot bomb — or the distance of almost two football fields.

Not stopping there, Rollins will also attempt to break the current Guinness World Record for ‘Longest Batted Ball’, which currently stands at 576 feet. The record is for the greatest distance one individual can hit a batted baseball in a legal manner with no restriction on equipment.

Rollins is encouraging his fellow Philadelphians to stop by to witness the science, the technology, the talent, the strength, or to just see their favorite professional athlete really hit it out of the park…and over a highway.



If you remember, Rollins was supposed to try this last year… but he hurt is calf the day before, during the Phillies' home opener.

His Twitter account, Facebook page, and most of his swag are all sponsored by Red Bull, who put together this melodramatic video (after the jump) hyping the event.

I'm sure this won't mess with his already long swing. Nope, not at all… I'll be there – with camera – to report back.

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Flyers May Not Play Rangers in Winter Classic

Kyle Scott - June 6, 2011

Photo source: Zimbio

As we mentioned last week, a Flyers-Rangers Winter Classic hasn't been officially confirmed by the NHL. An announcement was expected from commissioner Gary Bettman by Friday, but, obviously, that didn't happen.

There may be good reason for that.

According to a couple of folks I've talked to, it is not a lock that the Flyers will play the Rangers on January 2nd at Citizens Bank Park.

While it is looking likely that the Flyers will be the host, I've been told that in addition to the Rangers, there are two other potential opponents: the Red Wings and Blackhawks.

As is always the case with unconfirmed reports, take this with a grain of salt. The NHL has confirmed nothing, and part of that may be because an opponent hasn't been locked-in, yet.

All three clubs would make sense from a league standpoint – the NHL wants high-profile teams with large fan bases playing in the game – but news of a Flyers-Rangers matchup has come from unconfirmed reports, not the league itself.

You can probably expect an announcement soon. Remember, back in 2009, news of a Flyers-Bruins matchup (in 2010) was first reported on June 24th… contradicting previous reports of a Capitals-Bruins Winter Classic.