The Sixers Will Unveil the World’s Largest T-Shirt Launcher Tonight

This post comes to you from an iPhone personal hotspot over a dodgy AT&T connection, since power is back but VERIZON FIOS IS STILL OUT AND I CAN’T RUN A GODDAMN BLOG WITHOUT IT!

Sorry.  

The Sixers open their season tonight and they’ll do so with  GIANT T-SHIRT LAUNCHER, named Big Bella. Be-fucking-hold: 

Screen Shot 2012-10-31 at 4.21.38 PM
Screen Shot 2012-10-31 at 4.21.38 PM

Beautiful. You know what I want to do with that thing? Shoot Verizon in the face. No one in particular. Just Verizon. As a whole. In the face.

Anyway, tonight, pencil in one gigantic t-shirt launcher and please remove one gigantic, injury-riddled center for the opener.

8 Comments

  1. Where’s Phil E. Moose when you need him?
    Is this thing our new mascot?

  2. Anyone else think that radio announcer Tom McGinnis is really annoying? Guy irks me on those 97.5 promo commercials

  3. Now THAT is cool! Anxiously awaiting the video! LoL!

  4. In more impressive news: during a test run at Lou Turk’s Halloween party last night, the Turbo Taint Tickler stimulated 100 pole dancers in Tinkerbell costumes, also in only 60 seconds.

  5. Brother Lee Love.

  6. Fios is awful.
    Are we ever going to hear from EDP about the Eagles game this week?

  7. Can you imagine Ed Snider launching anything free into the stands?

  8. Ed Snider is a pos

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