Why That Tim Tebow was Spotted at the Philly Airport Rumor is Complete Horseshit

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So there is a rumor going around today, because it’s a day that ends in day, that Tim Tebow was spotted at Philadelphia International airport. It’s the same rumor that I’ve received via Tweet or email every day for the past two weeks.

Either Timmay is getting his Ed Snowden on, or it’s not true.

So, where did such malarkey germinate? Probably with this insanely unverified Tweet to Trey Wingo:

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That Tweet was likely auto-picked up by Smarp News, a junky Twitter account dedicated to spreading celebrity sighting rumors, which, with its official-looking icon, sent Twitter into a frenzy:

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And how do you know that Smarp is just a junky Twitter account dedicated to spreading celebrity sighting rumors? Here are two more Tweets from today:

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Tim Tebow may be able to walk on water, but there’s no way he got from the Springfield Mall to his hotel in Pittsburgh in two hours flat. The traffic on Baltimore Pike alone would’ve cost him 45 minutes.

In fact, the credit to RochesRWinners is the dead giveaway. DEAD GIVEAWAY. That’s the Twitter account of Philly Sports Talk producer Dan Roche, who is annoyingly sarcastic on Twitter:

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This is a dead giveaway, too:

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But don’t worry, Philly, we’re not the only city to fall for this ruse. Tebow was in Cleveland last week:

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Right.

That Tweet about the Eagles’ plane being in Cleveland links to some of the worst reporting you will ever see. That FOX Sports story contains a picture of an Eagles US Airways plane and the following words organized into mind-numbingly stupid sentences:

Here’s a photo taken an hour ago by the cle_airport account on Instagram. Look, it’s probably nothing, right? But then again, hmmm…. The #OHSportsBuzz is all about things that make you go “Hmmm”.

We’re not saying that the Eagles have a quarterback to trade or anything. It’s probably just making a pit stop. Hmmm.

No, it doesn’t make you go hmmm, asshole. First of all, I’m not even sure they actually fly on that. US Airways is an official sponsor of the Eagles and, presumably as part of the deal, the Eagles get their livery on a plane. It’s nothing more than paint.

Two: IT’S A FUCKING PLANE. What, do you think it makes eight road trips a year and sits on the tarmac the rest of the time? It flies, all day, every single day. I’ve seen it, too. I’ve seen other teams’ planes. I even once saw a Southwest Shamu plane, but I don’t think the killer whale was on it.

So, as much as I’d like for it to be true (just so we have something to talk about), Tim Tebow was not in Philly today, or Pittsburgh. Or at the Springfield Mall. Or in Cleveland last week.

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Get a grip, people.

10 Comments

  1. Actually, looks like Tim is in Philly today. You make a good point about the time it takes to get from one end of town to the other, but remember, that you don’t know how timely people made their reports. If you look at the order of reports and the number of people making them, looks like he’s their. Doesn’t mean he’s meeting with the Eagles though.

    • Kyle Scott

      October 28, 2013 at 6:14 pm

      Stop it.

      • Shut your fuckin mouth Kyle you lazy shortsighted idiotic flaming ass pile of seagull shit. Youre a fucking travesty and your asinine analysis of Tim Tebow not being in philly, which is clearly incorrect, makes me want swim in a tank full of hungry piranhas. Go fuck yourself you stupid mule.

  2. Damn shame. Tebow, Vick, and Cooper together could have made for a great sitcom.

  3. Did coke with Tebow @ Binny and Flynns back in the day.

  4. Should sign him. Maybe he can say some extra prayers for a home win at the pathetic Linc

  5. I saw Tebow walk into the men’s room at Dallas/Ft Worth with that queer Troy Aikman this afternoon.

  6. If those comments are serious about Tebow being here, why haven’t there been any pictures of him then?

  7. Kyle, you’re right about the airlines. The Eagles fly through Delta(I have a friend that works in the coaches booth each week and travels with the team). Also was at Philly Airport a couple weeks ago on a Wednesday afternoon and a US Airways Eagles plane was right next a Steelers US Airways plane, yea they’re just commercial flights. Moving on….

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