Unfortunately, we can no longer in good faith believe in the legend of “Who wants to sex Mutombo.” But when the sports gods close one door, they open another, in the form of new 76er Joel Embiid in a car with a smaller, whiter person:
White kid: “I’m like 5’10″ and I got a seven inch dick.”
Embiid: “You never do that shit you know?”
Off camera: “Who’s got a bigger dick?”
Embiid: “OF COURSE ME! I’M THE N*GGA”
Barstool has the video here. And with this, we know in our heart of hearts, that Hinkie made the right call. Also, as a side note, there’s no way Embiid is wrong here.