Look, I have no illusions about what making $125 million over any five-year span will get you (spoiler: A LOT), and I have seen and posted countless photos of the construction of Ryan Howard’s Florida castle, but these pictures sent to me by my friend, who’s in the F-L-A visiting family, are insane. Look at this F-ing place:

Like, we’ve joked about the moat and the castle thing, but that TOWER, which I guess houses a round staircase, could’ve been used as a lookout in King’s Landing.

Not to be outdone, HughE Dillon brings us some news on the Hamels. Heidi is now a country song writer (of course she is), and she and Cole are selling their 32,000 square foot Missouri mansion for $10 million. LOOK AT THIS PLACE:

That’s… excessive.

From the listing:

Once in a lifetime opportunity to own this luxury lakefront estate at a fraction of the cost to build. This well designed French provincial home is situated on 104.7 acres with over 1700 feet of shoreline access and a private dock. With the exterior near completion, the home is being offered with an unfinished interior to serve as a blank canvas for a new owner to put the finishing touches on. Inside you will find this home boasts an amazing 10 bedrooms, 13 full bathrooms, 6 half baths and 4 separate living areas in nearly 32,000 square feet of space. The entire home has been constructed to commercial building code standards, including fire sprinklers as not to limit the use of the property. If quality is what you a seeking, this is it. Own the finest property the Ozarks has to offer!

But sometimes all the money in the world can’t buy you success. Howard signed a minor league deal with the Rockies and went 1-for-6 in his debut with the Albuquerque Isotopes, though he did hit a double:

Take the good with the bad.

Next man up.

Let’s hit it! Continue Reading

Hey LaVar Ball opened his mouth again. He and Lonzo participated in an ESPN interview from their home. And who would’ve guessed it but LaVar has some interesting thoughts on rearing children:

Also during the interview, Ball talked about different types of discipline he used on his sons, including giving Lonzo “a couple of hits upside the head” after he missed curfew and was pulled over by police in high school, and using a “belt or something” to discipline LaMelo.

Ball later clarified remarks he made during the interview, saying that he has spanked each son once in their lives — and that has instilled a sense of fear so that he hasn’t needed to do it again.

“I spanked them once,” Ball said. “To let them know there are repercussions at times. But my boys are respectful, and usually my voice is enough.”

Oh so this should ignite a fun debate, and thankfully Chris Broussard has ALREADY weighed IN and presumably SHOUTED HIS response:

Respect or fear? I’ve had a few people respond on Twitter that they were hit and turned out just fine. That’s cool. I doubt there’s correlation there, though. Plenty of parents can teach their kids to be respectful without hitting them with a belt.

LaVar, naturally, turned his attention to the Lakers, and that’s when things headed straight to crazy town:

LiAngelo will be a freshman this season at UCLA, and although LaVar Ball said he expects his middle son to average 25 points per game, he wasn’t heralded coming out of high school despite averaging more than 30 points per game this past season.

Multiple NBA executives said the 6-foot-5 LiAngelo, whose strength is shooting the ball, isn’t even on their draft boards.

“All my boys are gonna be one-and-done. Gelo [LiAngelo] is going [to] be one-and-done whether he’s good or bad,” LaVar said. “I’m going to put him in the draft, hope they don’t take him. Bring him into the Lakers as a free agent, let him wind up with his brother and watch how good they play together.”

Added Lonzo: “Knowing my brother, I think he’ll be ready. Look at his body; he’s already [got an] NBA-ready body. I know he can shoot. I know he has the skills. I’m confident.”

The youngest son, LaMelo, will be a junior at Chino Hills High. He’s a 6-foot-5 guard who is known for his flashy play and ability to shoot the ball from deep.

“I’m going to do the same thing with Melo,” LaVar said. “And we get three of the Ball boys on the Lakers together, and we gonna go championship, championship, championship, championship, championship. You think I’m playing? You saw what they did in high school.”

Meanwhile, the Lakers:

Side note:

I agree. LaVar is the wackadoo. But let’s talk about the kid who sits next to him and doesn’t say anything, thinking this is all normal. LaVar knows he’s nuts– Lonzo might not. It’s always the quiet ones who are the true psychos. LaVar’s out here yelling about shoes and lashings, meanwhile Lonzo could have a freezer full of human arms and bread pudding and we’d have no idea. When they ask someone about their serial killer neighbor, they never say “Yeah, guy was nuts– always out in the street firing shots into the air, daring people to test him.” It’s always the respectful loner who they only saw taking out the trash and coming home late at night (hint: from murdering) who had the house full of dismembered corpses covered in semen and positioned so their spleens (WTF) were facing due north. Not calling Lonzo a murderer, but just saying… maybe he’s not the sane one in this improbable duo. Either way, I’d draft the shit out of him at three. Best available and all.

Video of the interview after the jump. Continue Reading