Fat Scott Paterno Responds Fatly and Angrily to Media Request

Scott_paterno_request

 

Later today (4 p.m.) the Washington Post will release an exclusive interview with Joe Paterno. Why 4 p.m.? I have no idea. But on Thursday, Fat Scott Paterno issued a statement which hinted at the gripes we will hear from his incongruently thin father. FSP's reemergence led some to assume that he was back in charge of Joe’s, um, public relations despite the announcement of image guru Dan McGinn being hired by the first family of Happy Valley back in November.  

So, Luke O’Brien of Deadspin left Scott a message to ask him about a tip he had received. FSP called back. Twice.

This is how O’Brien translated their “conversation”: [Deadspin]

SCOTT: WICKSOLLERSANDDANMCGINNAREHANDLINGALLMEDIAREQUESTSDON'TBOTHERSEFANYMORE! 

SCOTT: WICKSOLLERSANDDANMCGINNAREHANDLINGALLMEDIAREQUESTS!!! 

 

Fat Scott Paterno was angered by the inquisition, and referred O’Brien to the aforementioned McGinn, who is apparently still running the show, which will pick up steam today at 4 p.m. when the Washington Post releases its interview with Joe. We will look forward to that.

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18 Responses

  1. I bet you are the first person to ever use Obama’s name as your handle when you anonymously troll the internet on a Saturday afternoon.

  2. In my experience, where there are several optional English equivalents for a German word, Google and Babelfish automatically choose the one that makes the

  3. What does Ms. CB think of your creative name calling? I mean, we haven’t heard what she thinks yet today. I got it! You should make a big post telling us her thoughts on your ability to name call.

  4. FYI, the only person anybody is allowed to make fun of because of his weight is Newt Gingrich.
    I still have no idea why Kyle is so butt hurt about Scott Paterno.

  5. “incongruently thin”??? What exactly is inconsistent about an 85 yr old chemo patient appearing thin, dickface?
    congrats on the thesaurus xmas present from your mom, though

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