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Photo via reader Cody

As always, this segment is sponsored by our friends from Drinker's Philadelphia, where you can get $1 hot dogs Flyers games. And really cheap drinks. Always.

Fucking Flyers fans– you’re everywhere.

1) Remember last week when NBC weather girl Sheena Parveen made the voyage back to her native Clearwater to go on an awkward lunch date with Hunter Pence where she asked him strange questions and he showed her that move which looked like The Shocker but was really The Matrix that could be opened up to become The Turkey? Breathe. Well, the trip was a booty call… of sorts.

She has a boyfriend in Tampa, according to Dan Gross. His name is Jamison Uhler, a former NBC 10 anchor and PHILADELPHIA DAILY NEWS SEXY SINGLE who used to date Kerri-Lee Halkett. Yeah, you hate this guy. And so, perhaps, does Hunter. 

2) SI.com has a gallery of all the goalie masks worn this year in the NHL. But they left out one of the three Bryz has worn. This one.

3) An arrest warrant was issued for Michael Vick’s brother, Marcus, today. He failed to show up for a court appearance for one reason or another. We really don’t care.

4) The very entitled David Murphy (Phillies beat writer), who doesn’t realize that the last person on earth you want to rip is someone with a following and no eddetour, told me today that I was like “an after school special on logical fallacy.” Guess he couldn’t fit those sorts of heady phrases into his 2,000 word prose on how the Phillies’ fastest player should use his speed more often.

5) This:

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6) Ryan Howard, who already shortened his Twitter handle by dropping the 6, is currently following two females on Twitter: His fianceé, Krystle Campbell, and Kim Kardashian. That is all.