Bryce Harper Would Like You to Not Throw Batteries at Him

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I have a better idea: How about Cole Hamels throws batteries at him?

The Washington Nationals and douchebag Bryce Harper come to town tonight, and of course that means Hamels’ intentional beanball will be discussed until we’re blue in the face and Brycecakes grows hair on his balls.

When asked about coming to Philly, the 19-year-old phenom, who needed 10 stitches after accidentally hitting himself in the face with a bat last week, dug deep for one of the nation’s favorite Philly fan moments. Here’s what Harper told reporters after the Nationals’ 9-3 win over the Orioles yesterday:

"Hopefully I get a couple boos," he said. "I'm excited to get up there and play. Hopefully they don't throw any batteries at me."


Alright, douche. 

Hamels, too, was asked about the upcoming series and, specifically, the incident from two weeks ago. Speaking about it for the first time since the night he hit Harper, here’s what Hamels told USA Today:

"Yeah, I accidentally stirred the pot," Hamels told USA TODAY Sports. "It was unintentional. But that's just the way it happens sometimes. It wasn't like they weren't going to try to beat me anyways."

"It was more of a thing where I wanted to see what the kid was made of," Hamels said. "Then it was like, 'OK, he showed me.' He showed me more than I could ever possibly have known. Obviously it kind of backfired in what I was intending." 


I have no idea what that means. 

But it didn't backfire. The Phillies still won the game (despite Harper stealing home) and, as we noted here, the incident kind of turned Hamels into a star, which isn’t a bad thing going into a free agency period that will surely pay him well over nine figures. 

Hamels will face the Nationals on Wednesday, when he goes up against Edwin Jackson.

Video of Harper’s comments after the jump.


21 Responses

  1. Here we go again with this masturbatory-like need to manufacture villans in our sports culture. This, of course, refers to all cities but we in Philadelphia are no slouch….and naturally lead by our media outlets and BLOGGERS alike. I get it, you need attention. If you can sensationalize, all the better. But this guy has done nothing to warrant the ire that you are trying to create. He is 19 years old, has handled the Cole Hamels thing beautifully and even is aware enough to make humorous quips in sound bytes.
    Quit taking yourselves so seriously and lighten up…or grow or the other. If anyone has a serious problem with Harper so far then they need a check up from the neck up. Let him become the enemy on his own time, not because we couldn’t wait for him to get there.

  2. I would agree with bigmyc if only Harper had left it at, “I’m excited to get up there and play”.

  3. I’m donating my D-cell batteries to the Peg-Harper-in-the-Dome cause.

  4. I think Harper is handling this well. Also, he’s not Nyger Morgan – a guy who deserves batteries being thrown at him!

  5. CB: You’ve been promoting hatred of this guy for more than a year. If some idiot does something really, really stupid this week – you should take a hard look at what you do for a living.

  6. wtf, why is the comment section of Pat the Bat weekend closed off? That’s weak Kyle

  7. I saw the clip of him saying he hopes he doesn’t get batteries thrown at him. he wasn’t being a dick. But I guess it makes for a better blog post if you say he was.

  8. I predict that some jackass will do somthing stupid, Philadelphia fans will be appropriately criticized, and then this site and others will fill up with complaints about how we are treated unfairly by the national media. Think for yourselves, people.

  9. Kyle has absolutely nothing to post other than the usual copy paste regurgitate.
    Flyers are out. Sixers hopefully have a run in them. Phils are a mediocre team at best. Football is 4 months away. You’ll be joining me on the unemployment line soon professional blogger

  10. If something is thrown at the 19yr old kid(Bryce Harper),then i wouldn’t be shocked because Philadelphia fans are the same fan base that throws up on little girls,kills people outside of their stadium,then get upset when the national media rips into you people for being the jerks and goons,that we know you are.

  11. Why all the hate for Harper? Did I miss something he said/did so far in his career?

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