Your Monday Morning Roundup: End of Days

Screen Shot 2012-07-02 at 9.21.24 AMNice and relaxing back here, you guys (via Jeff)

What would you say if, a year ago today, I told you that emails indicating further knowledge from Joe Paterno of boys getting raped at Penn State would be revealed, Cliff Lee would be winless in July (and mostly healthy), the Flyers would re-sign Michael Leighton, Mike Richards and Jeff Carter would win the Stanley Cup (together), Carlos Ruiz would be leading the league in hitting, Jim Thome would be signed and later traded by the Phillies, and Cole Hamels would be on the block?

You’d tell me I’m fucking nuts, right? 

Right.

But I’m not nuts (OK, maybe a little)– that all happened. Most of it, this weekend.

Let’s hit it.

 

But first, a word from our sponsors

– Be sure to visit Drinker’s Philadelphia locations. Normally, we use this spot to tell you how great of a place it is to watch summer Phillies games. But we won’t lie: there is no good place to watch the Phillies right now. If you watched the Phillies at a massage parlor drinking a bottle of free tequila and feasting on high-end steak, watching the Phillies still wouldn’t be an enjoyable experience. BUT GOOD NEWS: Drinker’s has cheap drinks, delicious hot dogs, tacos and wings, and enough TVs to make you want to keep drinking as the Phillies explode before your very eyes. Location details here.

– As we turn our sights to football season, be sure to visit BC Sports for all your Eagles memorabilia. Everything from jerseys to signed pictures can be found here.

Buy 2, Get 1 FREE on Philly Phaithful t-shirts. Support the local team (or K Lot) and stay cool in these American Apparel t-shirts. Two of them, for the price of one. Shop here.

 

The roundup:

The Phillies may trade Cole Hamels

– The Flyers re-signed Michale Leighton to a one-year, $900,000 deal yesterday and reportedly made $80 million offers to Zach Parise and Ryan Suter. Our running commentary continues today. If it happens, it's here (that's our cheesy cable news tagline given to our live blog clusterfuck).

– CNN uncovers emails detailing additional involvement from Joe Paterno.

– New York Times hammers Joe Pa.

Carlos Ruiz is an All-Star.

Jim Thome is gone

– Using some fuzzy math, ESPN still thinks the Phillies could make the playoffs.

– Scientologists are tailing Katie Holmes. Unfortunately, it’s not her tail we’re talking about (wouldn’t matter, because Tom ruined it, anyway). That matter, the subject of my best Tweet ever: 

drops mic

– Philly bank robber rocking throwback Phillies cap.

– Nastia Lukin faceplanted during last night’s Olympic trials.

Erin Andrew is joining FOX Sports.

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9 Responses

  1. If Hamels is not signing here, you have to trade him – plain and simple.
    I would also like to see them trade Victorino, him and that stupid grin.

  2. Could they be gauging teams with Cole, but turn around and offer Lee to them?
    If they trade Hamels, Lee and/or Victorino…it’s over. Time to rebuild.

  3. Shnarkle,
    So you only trade Cole for 4 can’t miss prospects? Talk about an arbitrary number. Still, what good does it do to have him finish the season here and not re-sign him?

  4. 81 games played,and the Phillies are 11games out of first place(pathetic).
    And stop trying to compare the Phillies organization to the Yankees in terms of being a historically winning franchise.
    That’s like comparing Rosie O’Donnell to Kate Upton.

  5. Open Letter to People Who Started Caring About the Phillies in October of 2008:
    Shut the fuck up about being done with the Phillies, you homos. Don’t go scraping the P bumper sticker off the Xterra that your mom bought you when you graduated with a degree in Liberal Arts from Bloomsburg. Even when the team slides into the inevitable few bad seasons, you can still come to games and make everyone else in the parking lot listen to your shitty music while drinking your flavor of the month microbrews. Or you can stay home and continue your studies of complete faggotry. You won’t be missed.
    Sincerely,
    The Fans Who Know Who Paul Byrd Is

  6. Fuck you Kyle Scott, last time I checked Penn State wasn’t in Philly so no need to write about PSU on your Philly sports blog! I used to love your blog as a Philly sports fan but I hate how the only time you write about PSU is the scandal! If you didn’t cover PSU football before no need to cover it now! Leave Joe Paterno alone! He did much more than anyone else would have done in his situation and if you actually look at the emails it doesn’t indicate he knew any more than he said he did. All it said was Tim Curley talked to Joe! It didn’t say he knew shit or had any part of making any decisions! Stop shitting on PSU focus on your shitty Philly university’s and sports teams.

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