Gagne Scores, Milbury Skivers Ovi, Bryz Talks About Stick Throwing

Screen Shot 2013-02-28 at 8.25.47 AM

Was Simon Gagne scoring the most Simon Gagne goal ever the least surprising thing to happen last night? Like, you know Ed Snider sent a little sweetener to the hockey and NBC-Comcast-we-own-every-fucking-thing gods for a little karma rubdown. Please sirs, station Simon in front of the net so he can score a hunched-over-on-his-stick special on a loose puck and put his arms up towards the heavens.

Screen Shot 2013-02-28 at 8.48.46 AM

Thank you, hockey gods (pic via the Flyers)

I wasn’t there, but something tells me Lou Nolan’s pipeular muscle memory didn’t forget a thing. 

Of course, Gagne scoring was an invitation for folks on Twitter to dig in since I poked fun at the Gagne trade on Tuesday, and since, surely, this will be what puts the Flyers over the top: 

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Now if you’ll please enjoy this Alexander Ovechkin .GIF while I digest penis: 

Ovi_fall

Let’s talk about the broadcast for a moment. Doc Emrick is the best announcer in sports right now. If you go around the different leagues, you have the following as the lead in each sport: football– Nantz, Buck (both are more passionate about other sports), basketball– Mike Breen (vanilla), and baseball– Buck (I like him, but he doesn’t touch Emrick).  

Doc’s vocabulary is outstanding. He uses great verbs. He’ll routinely bust out squibbed, filtered, skittered and other words that sound more like a bad toilet event than the word I would probably use in all of those situatii: pass

Mike Milbury absolutely skivered (how’d I do?) Ovechkin during the intermission last night:

Finally, let’s talk about Bryz’s stick throwing. He did it again yesterday in practice (video after the jump), and this time he caught the attention of Peter Laviolette:

Screen Shot 2013-02-28 at 8.16.09 AM

When asked about it by reporters after the game, Bryz's answers were about as disrespectful as it comes:

 Q: In practice today, you threw the stick, has there been a little frustration there?

 A: No it was for fun, I just want to.

 Q: In reference to the previous question: So Lavi (Peter Laviolette) came over and I don’t know if it was a light hearted comment or what?

 A: You’re going to have to ask him, I can’t hear him.  With other guys shooting pucks and the boards, it was very loud.

 Q: Do you generally throw the stick for fun?

 A: Yeah once in a while, sometimes you want something right? Sometimes you wake up and want something.

 

Grow up.


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72 Comments

  • Moop February 28, 2013 at 9:05 am

    I’m not one for internet memes.
    However, reading this has given me the cancer.

    Reply
  • RobC February 28, 2013 at 9:10 am

    Too bad the sound of Emrick’s grating voice makes me want to kill myself or I might be able to enjoy his verb usage. Maybe Ill try closed caption instead of just listening to the radio.

    Reply
  • ThePhillyFlash February 28, 2013 at 9:15 am

    I’d listen to Doc recite Fifty Shades of Grey. He’s that damn good.

    Reply
  • MM February 28, 2013 at 9:17 am

    If bryz didn’t throw sticks he woulda had the shutout, plus he makes 51 million, wha wha wha, eat a dick is right.

    Reply
  • your blog is bad and you should feel bad February 28, 2013 at 9:18 am

    I’m sorry, alls I heard was WAAAAAAH WAAAAAAAAH WAAAAAAAAAAAAAH

    Reply
  • DT February 28, 2013 at 9:31 am

    Sigh….
    The petulant blogger with an axe to grind telling the professional goaltender who is carrying a nearly unheard of workload to grow up, yes that sums things up on this site perfectly.
    Maybe Bryzgalov should bleach his hair near white and start publicly finger-banging drunken Sea Isle skanks on the back of his jet ski to get some respect around here.

    Reply
  • Gray February 28, 2013 at 9:38 am

    And you blocked me on twitter? Exactly what I’m talking about Kyle – you have turned into EXACTLY the thing you made fun of for years, a self important, self centered miserable fuck. It’s ok for YOU to slam people and other reporters…but if someone calls you out, you block them? Such a waste.
    Lol I seriously can’t believe you blocked me for that tweet, what a bitch.

    Reply
  • TheGuyInTheBackOficeCube'sLowriderInSteadyMobbin' February 28, 2013 at 9:43 am

    I think anyone who grew up listening to Doc on Prism will always have an affinity to him. The guy is the best at what he does.

    Reply
  • JD February 28, 2013 at 9:43 am

    ^^^^^^^ Wow!

    Reply
  • Mr. Schniedelwichsen February 28, 2013 at 9:44 am

    I dunno why you are hating on Simon Gagne, dude is a class act and a fan favorite.
    You should eat a whole lot of dicks.

    Reply
  • Dan Griffoni February 28, 2013 at 9:44 am

    I’d throw a stick Bryz’s way… if you know what i mean… What a hunky hunkster

    Reply
  • Chris February 28, 2013 at 9:45 am

    Dear God, please turn the unregistered comments off again, for the sake of all our IQs.

    Reply
  • Danny The Count February 28, 2013 at 9:51 am

    Sean Brace blocked me on twitter for busting his chops in a good way. I’ll never listen to that dude again on his terrible radio show.

    Reply
  • Kevin Brearey February 28, 2013 at 9:52 am

    I grew up listening to Gene Hart. HE was the greatest ever. Emerick is OK, but I have always felt he was an inferior product. The very first time I ever got to watch a Flyers home game on TV was the year that Emerick and Bill Clement took over the TV broadcast as opposed to the Gene and Bobby simulcast on radio and TV. I found myself wondering why the “between periods” guy was now announcing games for the Flyers.

    Reply
  • James February 28, 2013 at 9:54 am

    So should Gagne have missed this on purpose because it was such an easy goal? Does he need to score a goal scorers goal before you say this was an ok move for a team that is down two forwards and might benefit a little from a player who wasn’t getting the ice time but believes he can still be a quality player. Dude you’re a joke. People rip you because you completely blow things out of proportion and you never seem to grasp why things happen in sports. You are the Angelo Cataldi of the blogging world. Nobody thinks the Gagne trade is the answer to all of the Flyers problems. They made this trade because they are down two forwards and gave up nothing for him and albeit being 32 years old still has something left in the tank plus he’s always been a good teammate and knows the organization well. This is what you should have written the day trade was made end of story.

    Reply
  • 3 Finger Lenny February 28, 2013 at 9:59 am

    Ill never forget big gene hart in his later years yelling “his dick is on the ice”

    Reply
  • J.T. February 28, 2013 at 10:10 am

    Emrick is alright, but he’s not the best in his sport. Unfortunately, the best is no longer on national games. His name is Gary Thorne, and when it was he and Clement doing the national games for ESPN you couldn’t find a more pleasurable sports watching experience.
    Don’t take the bait about Kyle talking about Bryz after he plays really well. Don’t take the bait, J.T. Don’t do it, don’t take the bait. Bryz, while not having being bombarded, made some big time saves and only lost the shutout after Kyle’s grandpa crush, Emrick, jinxed it. Don’t take the bait, J.T.
    Phew. That was close.
    Agreed with other comments- between Gagne and Bryz, you should eat a dick today.

    Reply
  • Candy from the Oak February 28, 2013 at 10:18 am

    Speaking of Gene Hart his over the hill, delco looking daughter has to step down or wear a mask during the anthem. she makes that man of a woman suzie Celek look like a current NFL wife

    Reply
  • Ron Hipple February 28, 2013 at 10:19 am

    Jim Jackon is god awful & annoying. Coatsey is only cool because he’s a drunk

    Reply
  • Crossing Broad Memes February 28, 2013 at 10:21 am

    One of the greatest, stand-up, most loveable flyers in recent memory comes back at a cheap low risk price. Rips him.

    Reply
  • Jrue Giroux February 28, 2013 at 10:22 am

    You think Doc is the best announcer in sports and you like Joe Buck? Are you serious or are you just trying to piss people off?

    Reply
  • Mr. Schniedelwichsen February 28, 2013 at 10:31 am

    To the douchebag who came at Lauren Hart above, you can go die a horrible death you scumbag.

    Reply
  • Crossing Out February 28, 2013 at 10:33 am

    Lost a reader over here. Abhorrent posts and bullshit “reporting” for a while now. Joe Buck? Jesus, man.

    Reply
  • Al TRU February 28, 2013 at 10:35 am

    Bryz is the Russsian version of Ron Hextall/Dan Bouchard (Atlanta Flames) saw Bouchard in the 70s protest a goal by whacking the glass repeatedly at the goal scorer(when they actually had a guy sit there and turn the goal light on)
    Throwing his stick ? thats a good sign. he’s focused and passionate.
    Keith Jones is a great informed announcer. Emery’s voice is fingernails on a blackboard.

    Reply
  • Candy from the Oak February 28, 2013 at 10:40 am

    @ Mr Schniedelwichsen,:( I would never cum on Mrs Hart too old.

    Reply
  • Ronde_Champ February 28, 2013 at 10:40 am

    If G threw his stick, he’d be a competitor and you’d talk about your man crush on him. But with Bryz, it’s “grow up”.

    Reply
  • Al TRU February 28, 2013 at 10:42 am

    Did anyone see Keith Jones btw periods when he said ” If I were the Flyers I’d think twice about trading Danny Brierre”

    Reply
  • Danny The Count February 28, 2013 at 10:45 am

    didn’t john boloris date gene heart’s daughter???

    Reply
  • Candy from the Oak February 28, 2013 at 10:48 am

    Think he gave her cancer:(

    Reply
  • Bryz February 28, 2013 at 10:48 am

    DA F!?! The NBC crew for national games are the worst. All pierre talsk about is the saskatoon moosehounds and how he has seen every nhl player play in juniors

    Reply
  • Candy from the Oak February 28, 2013 at 10:50 am

    Heard pierre mcguire does coke off Coasty’s nose between the benches

    Reply
  • Lex Luger February 28, 2013 at 10:56 am

    So Pierre, coatsey, Jim Jackson & jonesy walk in to a bar……….

    Reply
  • Burnt Toast February 28, 2013 at 11:03 am

    “NBC-Comcast-we-own-every-fucking-thing gods”… this schtick, along with all of the “Bryzgalovalovalovov”‘s (just an example) has grown tired.

    Reply
  • DmitriYushkevich February 28, 2013 at 11:05 am

    braydon coburn still sucks, -9 plus/minus rating, allowed ward to skate behind him last night for the only goal.

    Reply
  • kyle sucks February 28, 2013 at 11:14 am

    doc is the worst announcer i’ve ever heard. eat a dick

    Reply
  • Al TRU February 28, 2013 at 11:17 am

    @Candy I “knew” alot of Delco girls. When they asked me to “kiss them where it stinks”
    I drove them to Marcus Hook.
    I’m here all weeek….try the Jimmy Johns Hot Dogs.

    Reply
  • MomOfTheGoalie February 28, 2013 at 11:18 am

    Jeeze Kyle, it’s bad when even the “soccer” moms stop following you. Drop me a line with you get your Flyers panties out of that wad they’re bunched in.

    Reply
  • Catch a damned pass February 28, 2013 at 11:43 am

    Gags looked better than he has in years last night.

    Reply
  • JohnnyRockets27 February 28, 2013 at 11:44 am

    HAHAHAHAAH Emrick is the best announcer in sports he says. let me just process that for a second…………………………………………. Okay now that ive sufficiently laughed at you kyle – while i do agree that compared to the other sports Emerick is way better, EVERY SINGLE ANNOUNCER from Hockey Night in Canada is better than Doc in every. single. way. Jim Hughson is my favorite, but Gord Miller and Chris Cuthbert are awesome too. Even in the US Joe Beninati, John Forslund, JJ, Ken Daniels, Rick Peckham, and Dave Strader are all way better than Doc Emrick if for no other reason than they have better voices and know more about the game. Also those guys dont treat the audience like kids with down syndrome or like people whove never watched hockey before. And also Pierre McGuire can go kill himself. hes as bad as chris wheeler if not worse

    Reply
  • JohnnyRockets27 February 28, 2013 at 11:46 am

    Oh and Rick Jeanneret too

    Reply
  • Todd February 28, 2013 at 12:21 pm

    Don’t understand all the hate for Doc. Kyle’s right, he’s the best lead play-by-play man in the country in any sport.
    Also, if you haven’t listened to Joe Buck lately you really should. Especially his call of Panda’s 3 homeruns in the World Series, he was actually EXCITING. Buck actually does get excited now and is instantly more likeable.

    Reply
  • Future Penn Grad Swag February 28, 2013 at 12:29 pm

    Nantz sucks, and Buck is probably a vike head (Because he was great in the 90’s). Never got the hate for Emrick though.

    Reply
  • Future Penn Grad Swag February 28, 2013 at 12:36 pm

    Also, Milbury’s analysis of Ovechkin could accurately describe his tenure as the GM of the New York Islanders. Too bad Bobby Clarke was too dumb to fleece him. We could have had Chara, Spezza, Luongo, and Bertuzzi for Lindros.

    Reply
  • President Dwayne Elizondo Mountain Dew Herbert Camacho February 28, 2013 at 12:38 pm

    We must be in Soviet Russia, where blog writer trolls you!

    Reply
  • Keith February 28, 2013 at 12:38 pm

    The funny thing about this silly Bryz hate is that a lot of “OB” fans, as you childishly refer to Kyle, have their gripes with Bryz. I know some have problems with the stick throwing, his puck handling, and his 1 v 1 woes, etc. But we’re not able to voice those opinions because there are too many idiots who are influenced by self important douche bags like you, kyle, that bitch and holler about Bryz being awful. Public sentiment goes a long way (IE Knuble and Gagne coming back), and Snider listens. Thats half the reason we got Bryz in the first place! Hes not perfect but hes 100 times better than what we’ve had over the last 15 years and if he keeps playing the way he has since last all star break, we could absolutely win a cup with him (if the rest of the team ever decides to show up). But sure, keep pouncing on him every time he sneezes the wrong way and run him out of town. Bring up, “HE MAKES 51 MILLION DOLLARAFR@#R@#R!” and whine about, “MY PRECIOUS STALLIONS CARTER AND RICHARDS WON THE CUP IN LA” and every other retarded point, thats completely irrelevant to his play, every time he gets upset at a defensive break down or lets in a bad goal (which, if you havent noticed, HAS BARELY BEEN HAPPENING AT ALL THIS SEASON). Jesus christ, you rip him for goals that he didn’t even give up for fucks sakes… GET.OVER. YOURSELF.
    And by the way, this is literally the only place that has had even a remotely negative spin on the Gagne trade.

    Reply
  • DT February 28, 2013 at 1:13 pm

    Emerick is not a good play by play guy as he never does play by play. It’s just one long stream of consciousness monologue that he bases on the play on the ice below him and interrupts now and again with a “and he SCORES!”
    I like him, seems like a good guy, has an interesting take on the game and a seemingly encyclopedic knowledge of the sport and its history, but as a play by play guy, no thanks. I can do without a four minute running anecdote that makes slight reference to the game action.

    Reply
  • Candy from the Oak February 28, 2013 at 1:16 pm

    @ Keith, little longer comment next time

    Reply
  • Keith February 28, 2013 at 1:22 pm

    Sorry, Oak. We all can’t spend the entire day on here trolling people like you do. Most of us have these things called jobs.

    Reply
  • Flyer February 28, 2013 at 1:39 pm

    Besides scoring, Gagne was very close to an assist. He was winning battles, he looked fairly fast out there, and he’s responsible in both ends. The Flyers traded a 4th round pick (4th round!) for a proven NHL player who wasn’t fitting in the Kings system. No one is asking Gagne to score 47 goals again, but if he can chip in a few goals, take some PP and PK time, and be a veteran presence in the locker room, the Flyers will have (yet again) won a trade with the Kings.

    Reply
  • Flyer February 28, 2013 at 1:50 pm

    Oh, and since you troll fans like me (Type OB fans I think you call them) I’m gonna troll you AGAIN for saying the Flyers lost those trades. Yeah, Richards and Carter won the Cup, we know. I also know if the Flyers kept Richards and Carter, that doesn’t guarantee a Cup last year. Instead, the Flyers traded two very good two way players for some very good youth players (something they were and still are in desperate need of; see: 2013 Phantoms) Now, you’ve stated that Voracek and Simmonds were average players, and that Schenn and Couturier MIGHT be great one day. Well, Simmonds alone has more points than Richards this year (not including Schenn) and Voracek has more points than Carter this year (not including Couturier). Couturier SHUT DOWN the MVP of the league last year IN THE PLAYOFFS as a NINETEEN year old and a ROOKIE. Schenn has shown glimpses of being a star, but is the only one you could make the case for possibly being a bust. Richards and Carter are entering (or in) their primes, while Simmonds, Voracek, Schenn, and Couturier still have TONS of growing to do, and they’re already as good as (or better) than Mike and Jeff.
    My point is, your only argument for the Flyers not winning those trades is that they lost proven players (with huge contracts) that ended up winning the Cup (Quick). Idc if Richards and Carter were 1 and 2 in terms of playoff scoring for the Flyers last year, Bryz (and the defense) would not have allowed the Flyers to win the Cup.
    Please, in your next Flyers post, at least entertain the idea that you MIGHT be wrong and Homer actually did make some good trades that will set this team up for the next 10 years. I’m not looking through “Type OB” glasses, I know hockey and I know the Flyers got better through those trades.

    Reply
  • eagles22 February 28, 2013 at 2:04 pm

    Al Michaels is better than any announcer. Sorry pal.

    Reply
  • Brad February 28, 2013 at 2:16 pm

    Am I the only one who actually likes Jim Jackson? I think he’s got a great voice and he lets the game breathe, unlike Emerick who showers the broadcast in shrill word vomit.

    Reply
  • DT February 28, 2013 at 2:21 pm

    I like Jim Jackson. I think you’re right on.

    Reply
  • Bryz February 28, 2013 at 2:25 pm

    he knifes the puck down the boards and heres pierre to give some great insight of saskatoon mooseasses and he SCOREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEESSSSSS

    Reply
  • Trash February 28, 2013 at 2:34 pm

    Best thing Emrick has ever said was during the Penguins-Flyers game two Wednsday night Rival games ago. He had the following gem:
    “Letang squirts one onto Crosby.”
    He sure did, Doc. He sure did…

    Reply
  • The Word February 28, 2013 at 2:54 pm

    Recap:
    1- Gagne deal is good because it didn’t cost them anything.
    2- Carter is not a two-way player. Richards is, but he is a cancer in the locker room and speaks out against the organization. Don’t ever take sides against the family, Fredo. When is the last time you saw G wearing a Rednex Rebellion cap in a post-game interview? Dude should have never worn the C.
    3- Bryz has played very well this season, he is being hung out to dry far too often by the slow D in front of him. Who cares if he throws a stick or two?
    4- Mike Emrick is a great hockey announcer. Gene Hart was the best ever. “No thanks” to Gary Thorne, and Joe Buck is a horse’s ass.
    5- Listen to JJ next game. Listen for the lazy announcing of names like “Tourier”, “Slan Fedotenko”, “Naldo” etc. Say the names, son.

    Reply
  • Crossing Broad Memes February 28, 2013 at 4:42 pm

    Tells people to grow up. Praises Doc Emrick for play by play that sounds like toilet humor.
    Says David Murphy is smug. Uses the word “situatii”.

    Reply
  • Admiral Piett's Larynx February 28, 2013 at 4:54 pm

    @The Word, I’ve never heard Jim Jackson utter any of those aforemnetioned abbreviations of players last names, he calls Fedotenko by his nickname, Rusty… Don’t know how anyone else feels, but I think Saunders is possibly the best play by play guy in Philly right now
    I’ll agree with you on Thorne though, he’s pretty lame
    And guys the Mosseheads are from Halifax, Saskatoon are the Blades… or maybe your thinking of the Moose Jaw Warriors… regardless, you’re right, Maguire has seen EVERY player in juniors and must let us know about it, though despite the know-it-all tone, i actually find him informative in those moments (though he does tend to get misty over the star player of whichever team is winning the game at any given time).

    Reply
  • Bill Clement's Mustache February 28, 2013 at 5:43 pm

    “What a class move by Harry Zolnierczyk by giving up his #12 to Simon Gagne who wore 12 while he spent 10 years with the Flyers previously”… Harry Z goes on to throw another thoughtless hit and this time might have actually injured someone… Zolierczyk has no sway here, he has to give his # up to Gagne, and I’m tired or his irresponsible play, like a chicken w it’s head cut off, send him down

    Reply
  • Danny B's fat kid February 28, 2013 at 5:48 pm

    hi

    Reply
  • J.T. February 28, 2013 at 7:02 pm

    Hey BCM, the NHL rescinded Harry Z’s boarding major because it was a completely clean it.
    Now, you could say there is no reason to throw that hit so late in the game, but remember the kid is fighting to keep a roster spot. He will most likely be sent down, so he has to make the most out of every second on the ice. Physical play has to part of his game, so he’s got to show that every opportunity he gets.
    That said, he’s a child pornographer, so…

    Reply
  • Every Phillies fan in October 08 February 28, 2013 at 9:58 pm

    FUCK JOE BUCK

    Reply
  • Marcus Hayes' Dildo February 28, 2013 at 10:29 pm

    Lol I hope you’re joking when you tell him to grow up. I hope to God.

    Reply
  • Jon Cleese February 28, 2013 at 10:41 pm

    Youre such a pussy. you would never ever say that to his face in real life you dickless piece of shit. You’ll say it on here though. Youll also say on here that American vets are useless…I dare you to try that to their faces you fuckin sick fuck.

    Reply
  • Mark March 1, 2013 at 7:23 am

    a 3 meg GIF image on the front page?
    Bad form Kyle… anyone looking on a smart phone is probably wonderign why things arent loading up

    Reply
  • Dan Griffoni March 1, 2013 at 10:43 am

    @Mark, let’s meet up and do the hippitty skippitty in my Mom’s basement, if you know what i mean….

    Reply
  • Uncle Meat March 1, 2013 at 10:54 am

    I’m surprised that Emerick is getting so much love here. I don’t consider myself a homer in the slightest, but Emerick (and Gary Thorne, referenced by another comment) can both suck a BBC as far as I’m concerned. I know I’ll take heat for this, but I don’t give a F—: Emerick and Thorne are both so biased against the Flyers it isn’t even funny.
    Every time the opposition scores, they get Emerick’s signature excited, my-balls-are-being-electrocuted call. I watched a Flyers game with him where the Flyers scored, and all he could say was, “..and the puck is in the net..” like he was unemotionally surprised and even questioning it. And during the Wed night Pens game, the Flyers were up 4-2, having come back from a 2-0 deficit (a BIG deal, but not to him), and Emerick makes the comment, “One more goal and the Pens have cut the lead in half!” all excited and shit. Okay, fine, but if you’re going to say that, then also say, “And one more goal by the Flyers can put a stranglehold on this game”. Something, anything, to even it out, but no, he doesn’t. It was all about the darling Penguins coming back, not about the Flyers putting them away.

    Reply
  • Eddie Olczyk March 1, 2013 at 4:50 pm

    Tell us how you really feel, Uncle Meat

    Reply
  • Tim Thielking March 1, 2013 at 6:09 pm

    mmmm mmmm mmmmmmm, guys in tight pants! My favorite!

    Reply
  • Todd March 2, 2013 at 12:19 pm

    @Uncle Meat
    Did you even watch the Flyers/Penguins game? Emerick’s call of that last goal caused his voice to crack cause he was so excited. He’s NOT biased against the Flyers, despite what all these Philadelphia conspiracy theorists think…

    Reply
  • AL TRU March 3, 2013 at 10:31 am

    Kyle give Giroux’s phone number to Cataldi so he can wake up call him at 6am

    Reply
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