The Passyunk Post is reporting that South Philly and Center City favorite Federal Donuts will be opening up in left field at CBP, taking over half of the oversized (an underrated) Alley Grill, where – I believe – they served mini donuts last year:
Taking over half of the Alley Grill in the left field plaza, the CBP FD’s menu will consist of the signature fried birds and a tight rotation of donuts. The left field plaza location puts Federal Donuts within a bones’ throw of the ever-popular Schmitter, so get your arteries ready for a long summer.
As Anthony Sica of PP (and likely every person reading this) points out, this does not bode well for fat guy Delmon Young, who has a fat clause in his contract. But I’ll gladly sacrifice one anti-Semitic outfielder for the good of Phillies fans everywhere. This is now the Phillies' best offseason acquisition.