Screen Shot 2013-04-26 at 8.37.57 AMI hate the NFL Draft. It’s three months of nonsensical speculation, screaming heads, and breakdowns of how fast fat guys can run. It’s like something out of Star Wars or Hunger Games, meant to mock society. Let’s put it on in prime time! Let’s load it with promos– “here’s Barry Sanders… from Madden 25.” Let’s get a photo op with the troops! Let’s have a creepy bubble head who takes his role in life WAY TOO SERIOUSLY be the face of all the idiocy! Yeah, this is perfect. Murica! Murica! 

I mean, Mel Kiper is on a jewelry ad for Mother’s Day on ESPN.com:

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That’s fucking frightening! If I gave my mom anything that was endorsed by Mel Kiper, she’d kick my fucking ass. He’s scary and I don’t like him. And the draft just bothers me. Even the introductory Photoshops are sponsored:

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Just pick the goddamn players and move on. We can talk about who got what and who after the draft… like we’re going to do right now:

The Eagles drafted a dude named Cox last year and a guy named Johnson this year– that was my immediate takeaway. After that, I was happy they got an offensive lineman, a big boy:

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After watching Michael Vick get destroyed the last few years, you can never have too many offensive linemen, especially when you have a coach who wants to do wacky things with the quarterback. Like the pick. But here’s what they are saying about Johnson (both before and after the draft):


Sheil Kapadia, Philly Mag:

The most athletic of the top-three left tackles. Johnson started his career as a junior-college quarterback. He then joined the Sooners as a tight end before switching over to defensive end. The 6-6, 303-pounder kept getting bigger and was eventually moved to the offensive line. He played right tackle as a junior and left tackle as a senior. He’s not considered as polished as Joeckel and Fisher, but might have the most upside, given his off-the-charts athleticism. Johnson could certainly be an option for the Eagles at No. 4. If they move down, they’ll probably lose out on him. The Lions (No. 5) or Cardinals (No. 7) could take him. A team could also trade up once Joeckel and Fisher are off the board.

Les Bowen, Philly.com:

Stoops and Kelly relayed the same anecdote about how Johnson was struggling to keep his weight within defensive-end range as he grew, Stoops asking the strength coach what it would take to get Johnson to 300 pounds, in order to play on the offensive line. In Kelly’s telling, the answer was a week and a cheeseburger. Stoops’ version cited the cheeseburger and 2 weeks.

“Sure enough, that was what happened . . . He was a big d-end, physical, tough. We loved him there, to be honest with you,” Stoops said. “We saw two practices and we said, ‘This is going to be incredible for him.’ We knew it. From d-end to tackle, it was easy for him . . . I said to him right then, I said, ‘You watch, you’re going to be a first-round draft choice.’ “

Jeff McLane, Philly.com:

Johnson, 22, has about as much experience playing tackle as Watkins did when the Eagles shockingly selected the former firefighter with the 23d overall pick in 2011. A former high school and junior college quarterback, Johnson moved to tackle only two years ago.

“I think he is ready, but he is raw,” Kelly said. “We look at raw as a positive, not a negative. If he’s doing what he’s doing right now, and he’s only played like two years on the offensive line . . . We felt that his ceiling is probably the highest.”

NFL.com:

Uses his athleticism well, displaying good foot quickness to mirror pass rushers off the edge to deny them the corner and adjust to their inside moves. Easily reaches second-level targets when pulled outside or stepping up in the box, and sustains the block. Generally plays with good pad level and balance despite his height, and can fire out from a three-point stance and generate a bit of push on run plays. Johnson’s feet keep moving through initial contact, allowing him to get into the correct blocking angle while engaged. He also uses his hands and length well to maintain distance with the defender. NFL coaches will like that he plays with an attitude, looks willing to hand-fight with defensive ends, usually lands multiple strong punches, and will consistently finish blocks with a strong-arm extension.

SI.com:

This is the most speculative of the three offensive tackle picks so far, as Johnson has much less experience playing that position than either Eric Fisher or Luke Joeckel. But at 6-foot-6 and just north of 300 pounds (up a staggering 80 pounds from his JUCO days), Johnson has the physical gifts to be productive at the next level.

Doug Farrar, Yahoo!:

Was it the right pick? Yes. Johnson is the most athletic tackle in this draft class, he fits Chip Kelly’s high-volume offense like a glove, and he covers the Eagles’ most glaring need.

In a nutshell: Johnson is athletic and skilled and has picked up his new position very quickly. He needs to put on muscle (not just cheeseburger fat) and work on his stance, his base. But he has a high ceiling, something that has been said about him by most talking heads.