We’re Going to Talk About Cody Asche’s Girlfriend Now

Kyle Scott - August 2, 2013

She's... the one on the left

She’s… the one on the left

Got a lot of Tweets about her the other night and, surprise!, she instantly grams herself! I’d give her a solid 8.5, pushing 9 in some pictures. Whereas our old friend Michael Schwimmmer went with brute force, Asche went girl next door. Which is the preferred choice.

Meet Angie (@angiealbers). She likes fun, sun, Cody Asche, the Phillies, the Cardinals and yoga.

Pictures after the jump. See, and who says things have been too real around here lately?


  • Junkhead August 2, 2013 at 3:54 pm

    Well played by Cody. Certainly a solid 8.5, so he left himself a little room to upgrade if he hits the big time in the majors.

    • Kyle ruined a guys life for $100 August 3, 2013 at 10:30 am

      I’m a huge fan of her. Good post Kyle

  • your mom August 2, 2013 at 4:00 pm

    is cody asche larry brothers with bam margera. you have to do side by side with bam’s mom and asche’s mom. identical

  • Southwest Philly Floater August 2, 2013 at 4:07 pm

    I’d eat her butt on a monday morning after a no-shower-sunday.

  • FACE August 2, 2013 at 4:09 pm

    Scwimmers chick is fucking hideous.

    Nicely done Cody, she is really, really nice. Good form!


  • Din The Troll August 2, 2013 at 4:13 pm

    She’s cute and all but I hink Cody must have left her titties in the Minor Leagues dugout…. 😛

  • Kid Charlemagne August 2, 2013 at 4:15 pm

    Nice of Cody’s mom to demonstrate for her how to massage Cody’s balls.

  • Pope Francis August 2, 2013 at 4:18 pm

    I heard Cody almost cried when he saw his mom in the stands. I also cried when I saw his girlfriend, except mine came out of my penis….

  • Stay Gold August 2, 2013 at 4:20 pm

    Blumpkin, Jelly Donut, or Hot Lunch? I mean for Wheels…Not This Dame….she seems like a chick who you can live with rolling over in the morning and seeing her without wanting to assault on the reg

  • Slamming Gretzky's Daugjher August 2, 2013 at 4:24 pm

    Kyle, know anything about her friend in that second picture? I’d like a piece of that.

  • Stay Gold August 2, 2013 at 4:26 pm

    also, i am loving the squirrel pelt on top of mrs. asche’s head, unlike the dead gopher on wheels. she’s the woman in the office you never make eye contact with, because you know she’s misearable and won’t say hi.

  • Suzanne Sucks Pu$$y August 2, 2013 at 4:26 pm

    Girl next door holy fuck. I want to take a cock-shaped shit right into her little butthole.

  • Candy from the Oak August 2, 2013 at 4:31 pm

    didn’t know his mom is from Delco

  • Tripod Larry August 2, 2013 at 4:43 pm

    Her friend in the second pic has some nice titties. I’d like to oil them up and have her envelop my huge rod and then I’ll bust off two times.

    • Tripod Larry August 2, 2013 at 4:44 pm

      And at the same time I’d st

      • Tripod Larry August 2, 2013 at 4:45 pm

        stick my finger in and out of Cody’s gf’s heiny hole.

  • Kid Charlemagne August 2, 2013 at 4:53 pm

    At least there’s no way a bunch of guys posting about how they would defile a cute little white girl could be considered offensive to anyone, is there?

  • JERRY August 2, 2013 at 4:59 pm

    No tit no care

  • Dusty Rhoades Joe Robertson August 2, 2013 at 5:22 pm

    I would lick her taint

  • Seriously? August 2, 2013 at 5:38 pm

    Maybe a 7. CB readers definitely need to get out more often if they consider her a 9.

  • Mr. Miyagi August 2, 2013 at 5:41 pm

    She looks like she could suck the bolts out of a battleship hull. The girlfriend is cute too.

    I would let her stomp up and down on my ding-a-ling while wearing Rich Gannon’s golf cleats.

  • Michael Martinez August 2, 2013 at 6:01 pm

    I’d lick her pussy after she just got done working out

  • A Classy Gentleman August 2, 2013 at 6:03 pm

    I love Lisa Hillary’s new Skrillex haircut and would definitely paste her eyelids shut behind a dumpster after porking her cornhole

  • John McDonald August 2, 2013 at 6:11 pm

    I would love to get her in a 69 position

  • Johnny Pervert August 2, 2013 at 6:15 pm

    Wow! I have enough photos to last awhile. Gotta go get some more supplies. Cocoa Butter, Cucumber Melon Lotion, Baby Oil, etc. Excuse me while I rub one out!

  • George "The Animal" Steele August 2, 2013 at 6:17 pm

    I’d eat the corn from her shit!

  • How does Sean Brace & Jon Marks have a job in radio August 2, 2013 at 6:22 pm

    Fuck You for making me listen these clowns on the radio like Sean Brace, mike miss, racist Ike Reese and Da Cuz speak about the racism for a week.

  • Rhea Hughe's Veal Cutlets August 2, 2013 at 6:22 pm

    I dunno. This is somehow….racist!

  • How does Sean Brace & Jon Marks have a job in radio August 2, 2013 at 6:23 pm

    Also I would to sniff Ashe’s GF’s panties (unwashed)

    • Turtle August 3, 2013 at 10:26 am

      97.5 should actually give them a m-f morning show slot. Can’t listen to that clown Angelo. Also I would stick my dick in the future mrs Ashe

  • Paul Orndorff August 2, 2013 at 6:37 pm

    Wonder if blacks are going to stop trying to fuck & rape white girls now because of Riley cooper

  • Matt From South Jersey August 2, 2013 at 6:48 pm

    I hope you guys don’t kiss your mothers, girlfriends, wives, daughters, etc with those mouths. I find it quite appalling that you guys talk about a girl like that. I see that there are A LOT of virgins who only have had their dominant hands as sexual partners the way y’all talk about her on this site. Maybe if you guys were gentlemen like myself, you would all have a beautiful woman inside and out by your side that you would love to marry one day like I do, but from these comments, I find it highly unlikely.

    • In Response August 2, 2013 at 6:54 pm

      So Matt’s pretty much a fucking faggot, am I right guys?

    • 3 Finger Lenny August 2, 2013 at 7:38 pm

      @Matt’s the type of dude who gossips in the kitchen with the girls at parties. Get off this site, pussy

    • 3 Finger Lenny August 2, 2013 at 7:40 pm

      Just read Matt’s whole comment. Good work bud lol

  • Angelo C August 2, 2013 at 6:52 pm

    Better hope KC the traffic girl dosn’t get hold of him..her fangs are lethal..just ask Pettibone

  • Chester Ihardlyknewher August 2, 2013 at 6:56 pm

    Cody your girl is subpar for a major leaguer and you need to start hitting the weights brah

  • T-Mac August 2, 2013 at 7:21 pm

    I bet you Cody plugs her booty hole while she does that crow position.

  • fugoutttahere August 2, 2013 at 10:33 pm

    chicks with a boy chest never get above a 5. those are teets not tits

  • average white male August 3, 2013 at 12:23 pm

    I want to have sexual intercourse with her. My penis may be a 4 but u r a 10.

  • stairspears August 3, 2013 at 12:30 pm

    Codys mom looks like a milf I plowed at a beat down delco bar.

  • Candy from the Oak August 3, 2013 at 2:30 pm

    is that Dave Robert’s jew son bones behind them

  • This site is a joke August 3, 2013 at 8:14 pm

    Kyles a Creepy Ass Cracker

  • Joe mamay August 4, 2013 at 2:33 am

    I would do Cody Ashe’s batting Avg. to her right now..

    yes, its hovering around a .069

  • Tony Barolin August 5, 2013 at 9:40 am

    I am a gay and would still fill her up with bone juice.

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