Tremendously strange and unique article in the City Paper today by Dan McQuade (the guy who charted Rocky’s run in Rocky II), who delves deeply – perhaps a little too deeply – into the erotic world of Flyers fan fiction on Mibba, the creative writing site which describes itself as a site designed for authors to share their stories, poems and articles and gain feedback from a growing audience.
It’s also a place for teenage girls to write about being fucked by Claude Giroux.
There’s lots of Flyers fan fiction on the site, much of it having to do with romantic encounters with the Flyers. There’s no way I can describe it better than McQuade did:
Most authors of Flyers fanfic identify themselves as young women, and this may be the one place on the Internet where this is actually true — it’s hard to imagine anybody but a young woman typing 3,000 words about 23-year-old Flyers winger Zac Rinaldo’s distress over being unable to see his long-distance girlfriend because he has to be on the road over the holidays. (The author of “Blue Christmas” lists her age as 17.) While the stories come with MPAA-style rankings from G to NC-17 and some get very, very explicit, the purely erotic stories are a minority. For example, “Immobile,” rated NC-17, doesn’t get to the actual sex until the 16th of 21 chapters.
The most popular Flyer leading man is team captain Claude Giroux, with more than 861,000 words devoted to him on Mibba alone. (For the approximate print equivalent, stack copies of Infinite Jest, Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince and the unabridged Moby-Dick on top of each other.)
McQuade spent a lot of time reading, which is mildly concerning.
But of course, you’re probably most interested in the explicit tales. I spent about 20 minutes on Mibba this morning – for you, the reader – and, besides feeling like I need a shower, I can verify that when they say NC-17, they mean NC-17.
Here’s an excerpt from Immobile, Chapter 15, A Slip:
“Don’t you know I can’t? Not around you.” He heard her do a little gasp when he pushed away the cotton so he could a finger inside her. God she was so fucking tight and hot and her inexperience aroused him even more. She bit down her on her lip to prevent herself from whimpering out loud to a feeling she had never experience before but failed miserably. Claude slipped another finger in and pumped, spreading how wet she was over his fingers while using the rough pad of his thumb to rub her on the outside.
“How’s that baby? Does that feel good?”
Tinsley didn’t say anything- she couldn’t anything. She just closed her eyes and moaned because Claude’s fingers had made her believed she had died and gone to some sort of heaven. She opened her eyes momentarily so she could wrap her legs around his waist, desperate to feel closer to him.
He chuckled good naturedly, “That’s my girl.”
Before she caught sight to what he was doing, he pulled her away from the wall and laid her out on his bed.
“Why…” she asked desperately, feeling his fingers leave her. She felt like she was going to explode at any minute now and couldn’t help but pout.
“Don’t worry,” he told her, leaning his lips over where his fingers just were. “Just repaying a favor.” He licked and lapped at her folds with his tongue until she was gasping and moaning with pleasure.
She tugged at his thick copper hair, “Pleasedon’tstop.” It sounded like a prayer.
Our female readers just temporarily blacked out.
Giroux’s biggest fan, via Eliot Shorr-Parks
Rinaldo is also quite popular on the site. I especially like the part in Chapter 3 of Good Girl, Young and Restless, where he is lured away from playing NHL 12 (cameo from Harry Z in this chapter, best I can tell he wasn’t filming anyone):
Mia sighed as she put the car in reverse and drove back to New Jersey. When Mia got home, Zac was sitting on the couch playing NHL 12. Mia walked into their room and shut the door. She went into the bathroom and wiped the make-up from her face. She let the hot water run in the tub and sat down on the toilet. She wiped the tears away from her eyes and got into the hot water. She leaned her head against the wall and closed her eyes.
Zac sighed as he placed the controller on the table and got up to walk to their bedroom. He sighed as he opened the door and heard the whimpers from the bathroom. “Fuck,” he said before stripping his clothes off. He stood up from the bed and walked into the bathroom and lifted Mia out of the tub before placing her between his legs in the tub.
“I am sorry,” he whispered as she stiffened in his arms. “I was an asshole earlier. I love you, Mia.”
He kissed her temple and hugged her closer to his body. Mia cried softly in his arms and Zac whispered sweet nothings in her ear. “I’m tired of fighting Zac and I’m tired of Kayla telling me that you are cheating on me. I want you to look me in my eyes right now and tell me that you love me and only me. I want you to look me in the eyes and tell me that you are not cheating and that everything is a lie.” Mia turned in his arms and looked him in the eyes.
Zac kissed her softly before putting his forehead to hers. “I love you and only you. I would never cheat on you. Everything that Kayla says is to get back at me. You have always been there for me and I never know how to repay you. I’m sorry that I’m not the best boyfriend at times but I love you. What I said earlier was completely uncalled for but let’s be honest, that blow job was amazing.”
I bet it was.
Anyway, that’s all you get from me. You can peruse the site at your own peril.
Back to McQuade. He ranked the Flyers by number of mentions on the site. Not surprisingly, G finished first (because oh she likes it that way):
Read McQuade’s full article here.
Similar to Mac Miller’s “knock knock” from two years ago, the “that’s my girl” quote from G is going to run rampant throughout the locker room all season long.
“our female readers just temporarily blacked out” hahahaha SO true…
This is sickening
Are there any stories about Bryz where the girls pay him $1.64M a year for the next 14 years to leave them the fuck alone?
LMAO! Just spilled my coffee
Now how many of those stories were secretly written by men? I’ll set the o/u at 30%
Or how about the o/u of dudes that are going to jerk it right now after reading these stories.
Is that a Princess Sass web site?
I can see Tim Panaccio jerking off to this
These aren’t fan fiction, these are just witness recounts of an average weekend for Princess Sass.
Shocked Simmonds isnt at the top, I know Delco girls love to disappoint their fathers in reality and fantasy
Any Carter/Richards Bukake stories?
Yeah but Kyle wrote them all and he’s too ashamed to share his personal fan fiction on his blog.
Is this just a Hockey blog now? I thought it was a philly sports blog…..
sorry no one gives a fuck about your New Jersey Sixers. maybe next decade
But why do we need 30 stories about a 1-3 team, with half of them not even about the team (Bieber’s NHL 13, fan fiction sex novels, mascot commercials, ex-players, etc) The only team worth a damn in the city right now is the Eagles and they suck too, but at least they are in 1st place…
Rinaldo was probably talking about the hot blonde sitting next to the bench. Simmonds was all over that too. I was sitting behind her.
Is jay wright mentioned in this teenage escapade stories?
My Claude Giroux fantasy is centered around him registering a point this season.
You seriously need a real job Kylie.
“McQuade spent a lot of time reading, which is mildly concerning.”
Poor guy doing actual research for a story. For shame!
You’re not impressed with douchey articles that revolve around one man scouring twitter?
That second story should have ended with Zac clocking Mia across the jaw and Mia drowning in the bathtub after getting knocked out. Zac would then be arrested and sentenced to two minutes for fighting and 2 minutes for instigation.
So mibba is for fanfiction statutory rape stories? Hank Moody would be thrilled!
How on earth did Voracek even make it on this list, PG-13 or otherwise? That man is quite homely.
If yoy replace “Claude Giroux” or “Zac Rinaldo” with “Cliff Lee,” then they read eerily similar to the “Cliff Lee pissed excellence last night” articles.
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