Claude Giroux and Jay Rosehill Guarantee a Win to Cop, Both Score Goals

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When officer George Dilworth showed up at 9th and Market to write up the police report when Claude Giroux’s Porsche got hit in a parking lot on Friday night, both Giroux and Jay Rosehill (who apparently runs in that circle) guaranteed a victory on Saturday. Which is exactly what the Flyers did. And not only did they win, but both Giroux and Rosehill each scored their first goal of the season (for Rosehill, it may be his last, too…). The Flyers– walking the talk.

So there, a positive story during this flaming turd of a sports year.

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25 Comments

  • Lt Clueless November 9, 2013 at 10:40 pm

    Why would you say that it may be Rosehill’s last? You really think they would trade him after signing him for two years, each year being at $675k? That isn’t even worth a piss in the toilet for a trade!!

    • Chris November 9, 2013 at 10:47 pm

      In an ideal world they trade for an actual hockey player and Rosehill is a healthy scratch for the rest of the season

    • Sergeant Buttfuck November 9, 2013 at 10:48 pm

      Good Point Lieutenant, now go shine my shoes you fuckin maggot!

      • Jonathan Martin November 9, 2013 at 11:00 pm

        Leave him alone!!

    • derek November 9, 2013 at 11:10 pm

      he prob meant that jay rosehill doesn’t score goals so prob wont score again this season.

    • Kyle Scott November 10, 2013 at 9:44 am

      No, I think he’s probably not good enough to score another.

  • Rob "Geechieboi4Life" Wilson November 9, 2013 at 11:17 pm

    I hole-hardedly agree, but allow me to play doubles advocate here for a moment. For all intensive purposes I think you are wrong. In an age where false morals are a diamond dozen, true virtues are a blessing in the skies. We often put our false morality on a petal stool like a bunch of pre-Madonnas, but you all seem to be taking something very valuable for granite. So I ask of you to mustard up all the strength you can because it is a doggy dog world out there. Although there is some merit to what you are saying it seems like you have a huge ship on your shoulder. In your argument you seem to throw everything in but the kids Nsync, and even though you are having a feel day with this I am here to bring you back into reality. I have a sick sense when it comes to these types of things. It is almost spooky, because I cannot turn a blonde eye to these glaring flaws in your rhetoric. I have zero taller ants when it comes to people spouting out hate in the name of moral righteousness. You just need to remember what comes around is all around, and when supply and command fails you will be the first to go. Make my words, when you get down to brass stacks it doesn’t take rocket appliances to get two birds stoned at once. It’s clear who makes the pants in this relationship, and sometimes you just have to swallow your prize and accept the facts. You might have to come to this conclusion through denial and error but I swear on my mother’s mating name that when you put the petal to the medal you will pass with flying carpets like it’s a peach of cake

    • John Kruk's Tummy November 11, 2013 at 3:58 pm

      This is glorious, bravo sir.

    • Kaitlin November 12, 2013 at 12:02 pm

      my favorite is “it doesn’t take rocket appliances to get two birds stoned at once.”

  • Rob "Geechieboi4Life" Wilson November 9, 2013 at 11:19 pm

    ▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬ஜ۩۞۩ஜ▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬
    DAMN THIS COMMENT IS FANCY
    ▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬ஜ۩۞۩ஜ▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬

  • MPH November 10, 2013 at 12:40 am

    Did that dude really say ‘for all intensive purposes’??

    • Peacock November 10, 2013 at 12:44 am

      And “doubles advocate”

    • flyers sign man November 10, 2013 at 3:01 pm

      hole-heartedly
      doubles advocate
      intensive purposes
      blessing in the skies
      petal stool
      pre-madonnas
      for granite
      mustard up
      doggy dog
      huge ship on your shoulder

      Guy is clearly trolling. The post makes no sense. Must be an example of all the wrong ways to use sayings.

  • Catch a damned pass November 10, 2013 at 2:42 am

    I believe we have our newest troll, douchers.

  • Dave Isaac November 10, 2013 at 4:16 am

    I can confirm that Jay Rosehill was only in attendance for the “sloppy seconds” his teammates promised him. And no, the Flyers didnt release that info on Instagram.

  • The Animal's Neck Mole November 10, 2013 at 9:05 am

    Lol- So he G scores his 1st goal against a crappy team and now kool aide drinking (Who want to lick ed Snider’s taint) fans
    think Giroux-O-Mania will run wild? Lol that’s a good one lol…let me laugh some more at that thought lol lol
    Lol

  • The Animal's Neck Mole November 10, 2013 at 9:07 am

    PCL to Rosehill ……

    “start packing for Adirondack”

    Pussy lol

  • Candy from the Oak November 10, 2013 at 11:06 am

    saw G blowing a guy at Frankford Hall

    • Get a Life November 10, 2013 at 7:14 pm

      You’re a tired act

      • Catch a damned pass November 10, 2013 at 11:00 pm

        GTFO this site you gayboy, how dare you disrespect our legendary douche-ruffler!

  • 3 Finger Lenny November 10, 2013 at 11:50 am

    Looks like Cheap Eddie Snider doesn’t give his players dental plans. Does not shock me

    • Fourth Down Freddie November 10, 2013 at 9:50 pm

      How do you know it’s is a hockey related incident? Candy, the floor is yours.

  • billy November 10, 2013 at 2:54 pm

    he spelled “shall” wrong.

  • DS November 11, 2013 at 9:36 am

    “Mother’s mating name”?? this guy cant be for real

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