Hmmmmmmmm. Call me a cynic, but there was a brief moment on Saturday when I wondered if Johnny Quinn – whose breaking out of the bathroom Tweet is the best Olympian use of social media since McKayla Maroney started instantly gramming pictures of her bitch face – was duping us all… if he was really stuck in the bathroom or just a genius attention-getter. I mean, look at his Instagram since:
Taken over the span of just two days, those are pictures of Quinn on the Today show, Good Morning America, CNN, FOX Sports 1– not to mention photos of him interviewing with local newspapers and Kristi Yamaguchi. And he’s tweeting with William Shatner. We will, of course, give him the benefit of the doubt on his bathroom story. It’s awesome, hilarious and a funny sidecar the Sochi problems tales. But he better not be jerking us around, because today he got stuck in an elevator:
Look, Johnny, these are great. Your misfortune is entertainment to us all and a future sponsorship deal to you. But this is America, and if there’s one thing we like more than building you up, it’s burning you down. We will burn you down, rain an ungodly fucking firestorm upon you if you’re playing us. Glad you got out. But just know our antennae are up now.
We look forward to seeing you in your sled.